I have a job. I have a job. I have a job. I have a job.
No matter how I say it to myself or how many times I say it, it doesn't quite seem real yet that I have a job. My new chair called me Professor Mon today and it just sounds too good to be true. I have a job.
This has been a crazy first job search, but now that it's over I can say that it worked out great. The very first school I applied to gave me my first interview and my first offer. And today I happily accepted. Everything about this position was earlier than what is normally done in my field, and I knew that if I was a top candidate for job, there was a chance that I would receive an offer before other positions in my field even started interviewing. But I applied knowing all of this because it was really an ideal situation for me coming from an R1 that was far from home. I knew I wanted a good professional experience, a serious change of scenery, and a place where I felt welcomed culturally and socially. Throughout my whole job search, my biggest problem has not been about finding places I liked, but about figuring out what type of institution I really wanted. I applied to just about every type and I'm not sure that was the best thing for me to do.
Job Hunting Tip #1: Figure out what you want ASAP, preferably before you go on the market. One of my mentors told me that I could have any job that I wanted and she was right, but I took a while to figure out what it was that I wanted. She told me to figure this out before I went on the market, but the market season came up so fast I thought the answer would "come to me" as I applied. That's a bad way to go about a search. My confusion created some unnecessary noise once I started receiving invitations to apply to some top R1 schools and early interviews. I started to go with the places that wanted me rather than with what I wanted. I was influenced by what other people wanted or thought best for me rather than what I wanted--bad idea.
Job Hunting Tip #2: Know Yourself.
I went into graduate school for one reason. My undergraduate experience. I loved my professors, loved the liberal arts environment, and I wanted to get my PhD so I could return to that kind of place in the future. More than anything else, that drove the decision I made today and I'm glad that was a deciding factor.
Job Hunting Tip #3: Remember This is a Beginning.
Throughout the dissertation process, I've heard folks say--"remember that this is not your magnum opus"--"it is just a start to your professional career"--"you don't have to try to do everything now." I think that the dissertation and a first job have strong parallels. What you do with both has to do with your own personal goals. For those who have goals to be the next big name in the field, what they do with their dissertation and where they take their first job is of the upmost importance. I've never had the goal of being the next big academic. I want a space to write and a life of teaching--so I chose a job that will give me those things at a place where I can BEGIN my professional career. I think first jobs, like dissertations, are the source of angst if they are viewed as the "well this is it" point in one's life in the academy. Both are important starting points but neither has to be the determining factor in the rest of one's career. As my mentor says--if you are excellent in what you do, you can have the things that you want.
So it's pretty close to official, I'll be a professor beginning in fall 2006 and I'm excited about this new beginning in my career. This gives me a great new deadline for my dissertation work--it takes some of the old pressure off and puts a new, I think more positive, pressure on. Before I wanted to be done primarily so I could leave my graduate school life behind--that motivation is still there, but now I want to be done so I can start my new life with a clean slate.
New Look Needed for New Attitude
My time away from the blog + Big changes in my professional and personal life +
New attitude towards the dissertation = Contemplation about a new design for the blog.
I'm thinking about it--but apparently the blue should stay:
Updates and regular dissertation writing and blogging to resume by December 1st!!
New attitude towards the dissertation = Contemplation about a new design for the blog.
I'm thinking about it--but apparently the blue should stay:
| Your Blog Should Be Blue |
 Your blog is a peaceful, calming force in the blogosphere. You tend to avoid conflict - you're more likely to share than rant. From your social causes to cute pet photos, your life is a (mostly) open book. |
Updates and regular dissertation writing and blogging to resume by December 1st!!
Job Hunting Advice
I have been collecting advice on a wide variety of areas from a wide variety of scholars in the job hunt--here are a few nuggets--
Negotiating 101
Take your time. This is an important decision. NEVER UNDERESTIMATE THE VALUE OF A GOOD QUALITY OF LIFE. While some scholars may look down on a decision influenced by location or weather or surrounding culture, if these things are important to you, do not allow others to devalue their importance. Being in an environment where you are happy and comfortable will make you a more productive scholar/teacher.
Also consider how this institution might fit into your future career goals. Will this be a good starting point for where you want to go later?
Make sure you ask LOTS of questions. Does the university have a good insurance plan? Are there possibilities for spousal hires? What is the departmental/institution attitude towards family-planning? Will the service obligations be a burden in your first few years in this new position. Find out EVERYTHING you need to know.
On Taking a Position Your Committee Might Not Like
"You must really work hard to detach yourself from the opinions of others. It is easier to develop a habit of mind to do this now rather than later. If you don't, you will self-destruct."
On Job Market Advice
Listen to what everyone has to say, and then don't. Follow your heart and make what you think is the best decision for you. Remember that "the only way to navigate academe is to be so excellent that everyone leaves you alone."
That's all for now--more as I continue to collect advice.
Negotiating 101
- Start with your base salary. Your base salary will determine a great deal about how "high" you can climb in the future. Many opportunities, like summer teaching, are determined by a percentage of your base salary. Consider your market value to the department and the institution and argue from there. Know what you are bringing to the table and how you will contribute. Try to get $$ added on to your base salary first before negotiating one-time $$ offers. Talk about future increases based on merit and cost-of-living.
- Make sure you have adequate start-up money for your office/lab. Computers and space should also be a part of this conversation.
- If you can't get more $$ added to your base salary work to secure other funding opportunities--summer research stipends/grants, conference travel funds, library budget, lab maintenance/upgrade funds, etc.
- Find a teaching load agreement that is comfortable for you. If your position covers other duties (administration, heavy service/advisement, curriculum development) talk about having your teaching time reassigned to account for those duties. It may also be useful for you to secure a cap on the number of students in your courses.
- Remember: "An institution that really wants you bad will work hard to protect you when you get there."
Take your time. This is an important decision. NEVER UNDERESTIMATE THE VALUE OF A GOOD QUALITY OF LIFE. While some scholars may look down on a decision influenced by location or weather or surrounding culture, if these things are important to you, do not allow others to devalue their importance. Being in an environment where you are happy and comfortable will make you a more productive scholar/teacher.
Also consider how this institution might fit into your future career goals. Will this be a good starting point for where you want to go later?
Make sure you ask LOTS of questions. Does the university have a good insurance plan? Are there possibilities for spousal hires? What is the departmental/institution attitude towards family-planning? Will the service obligations be a burden in your first few years in this new position. Find out EVERYTHING you need to know.
On Taking a Position Your Committee Might Not Like
"You must really work hard to detach yourself from the opinions of others. It is easier to develop a habit of mind to do this now rather than later. If you don't, you will self-destruct."
On Job Market Advice
Listen to what everyone has to say, and then don't. Follow your heart and make what you think is the best decision for you. Remember that "the only way to navigate academe is to be so excellent that everyone leaves you alone."
That's all for now--more as I continue to collect advice.
Wow, What's Next?!
It has been a crazy few weeks. I'm unpacking only to repack again. I miss writing. My dissertation is calling me and I was glad to get a few moments of writing in here and there at the airport; but, I am in need of some serious writing time soon. Won't be today.
I had a great visit and a great conference. I got exactly what I went to the conference to get as well as a few other invitations to visit campuses. I know I'm very blessed and I'm excited about next year already. Now the next phase for me is tricky--negotiations--and checking out comparable opportunities.
Just a quick update--regular dissertation blogging to return soon (I hope). Happy Thanksgiving Holidays!
I had a great visit and a great conference. I got exactly what I went to the conference to get as well as a few other invitations to visit campuses. I know I'm very blessed and I'm excited about next year already. Now the next phase for me is tricky--negotiations--and checking out comparable opportunities.
Just a quick update--regular dissertation blogging to return soon (I hope). Happy Thanksgiving Holidays!
Packing Up
Ok, now comes the fun part--packing up for the rest of the month. Fancy-Smanchy University Affair to pack for. Campus Visit to pack for. National Conference to pack for. Oh, and then there's Thanksgiving. Fun Fun Fun. I'll have about 40 hours combined in there somewhere between these trips to do some possible unpacking/repacking but I want to keep this as organized a venture as possible.
I will be on a serious blogging hiatus for the next few weeks as I try to get a JOB.
I will be on a serious blogging hiatus for the next few weeks as I try to get a JOB.
PRACTICE PRACTICE PRACTICE
The Talk is done. The teaching gig is organized. Just practicing away. But to keep things interesting--I'm catching a cold. Of course. Just when I need to talk, I can't breathe.
But the show must go on. Lots of early bedtimes for me for the rest of the week.
Before I enter some medicated sleep tonight, I need to print out all my conference papers as well so I can start practicing those. I figure I'll look at them mostly in the hotel while I'm on campus and in the airports--they'll be my spare minute readings until I get through this visit.
So much fun being an academic--really it is.
But the show must go on. Lots of early bedtimes for me for the rest of the week.
Before I enter some medicated sleep tonight, I need to print out all my conference papers as well so I can start practicing those. I figure I'll look at them mostly in the hotel while I'm on campus and in the airports--they'll be my spare minute readings until I get through this visit.
So much fun being an academic--really it is.
Keeping the PowerPoint
I decided to fix up my notes into a real PowerPoint. Thanks abd me for the confirmation. I have some compelling pictures that I'm analyzing in my dissertation, so I'll share those with the audience. The other slides just have very short points (1-3 words) that summarize my overall project and research agenda. I think it looks pretty good. But I had one of those, this-is-why- sometimes-you-need-to-be-on-campus moments today; I need to actually see how the pictures show up on a projector (are they big enough, bright enough, etc.). Fortunately, Dr. John is going to get me into a classroom on his campus so I can see it. (Dr. John saves the day again!)
Everything is coming together and I'm feeling comfortable with the presentation more and more. The teaching time will be fine--I get to speak with some smart students about one of my favorite historical figures. I'm looking forward to that. I have a few more days to prepare, actually I have longer than that before the actual visit, but I have to run out of town for a bit before I go to campus, so I want to get everything down by, oh, tomorrow. Come Wednesday, I'm going to be packing up basically for the rest of the month! I guess I should try to get a little more dissertation work done before I go too huh.
Everything is coming together and I'm feeling comfortable with the presentation more and more. The teaching time will be fine--I get to speak with some smart students about one of my favorite historical figures. I'm looking forward to that. I have a few more days to prepare, actually I have longer than that before the actual visit, but I have to run out of town for a bit before I go to campus, so I want to get everything down by, oh, tomorrow. Come Wednesday, I'm going to be packing up basically for the rest of the month! I guess I should try to get a little more dissertation work done before I go too huh.
Research Talk--PowerPoint or Handout??
Or neither?? Sigh. I did something that I never do. I made a PowerPoint of a my presentation to help me get my ideas on paper. I used blank slides to show some pictures I was planning to talk about during the presentation, and white slides to jot down some notes for myself. I never actually planned on doing a full blown PowerPoint. This was just all a part of my inventional process to get thinking on this thing, and to help me nail down my talk so I don't have to carry notes. I RARELY speak from extended notes, maybe some quoted material but that's usually it--presentation outlines stay in my head after a couple days of practice.
Anyways, tonight when I opened the file, I realized that it actually looks like a PowerPoint. Now generally, when I teach students about visual aids, I try to encourage them to keep aids as VISUAL as possible. I think PowerPoint works best when most of the material is not plain text. Well, I'm in the humanities so I don't have any snazzy stats to turn into a graph or a nice machine to diagram. So I would be violating my own rule in a lot of ways to give this presentation. BUT, it's a long talk, and let's face it, it's easier for an audience to get through a talk when they have something to look at. So I'm torn. Should I give a PowerPoint "supported" presentation? Or would that just go against all my instincts as a classically trained humanities scholar??
I think I've ruled out a handout. I hate when my students do handouts and they always get thrown away. So why go through the motions of wasting paper. And then there is always the--well how many do I need--question. No handout.
PowerPoint is still a maybe.
Anyways, tonight when I opened the file, I realized that it actually looks like a PowerPoint. Now generally, when I teach students about visual aids, I try to encourage them to keep aids as VISUAL as possible. I think PowerPoint works best when most of the material is not plain text. Well, I'm in the humanities so I don't have any snazzy stats to turn into a graph or a nice machine to diagram. So I would be violating my own rule in a lot of ways to give this presentation. BUT, it's a long talk, and let's face it, it's easier for an audience to get through a talk when they have something to look at. So I'm torn. Should I give a PowerPoint "supported" presentation? Or would that just go against all my instincts as a classically trained humanities scholar??
I think I've ruled out a handout. I hate when my students do handouts and they always get thrown away. So why go through the motions of wasting paper. And then there is always the--well how many do I need--question. No handout.
PowerPoint is still a maybe.
Homework Day
A productive day of "getting my homework done." I was given more information today on upcoming Important Visit--particularly details about my teaching presentation. I now know what class I'm teaching in, have a better idea of what the students know, and where I'm coming into the mix. So I have a couple ideas in mind--just need to pick one--by say, tomorrow. I've also spent a lot of today researching the department and the faculty on a more in-depth level. Ran across a couple of published pieces that got me thinking about my dissertation so I followed those rabbit trails--came up with a few more articles that could support the diss. But overall it's been good so far just to read over pieces from different aspects of my field, and I'm learning a lot about my field in general by reading the works of this group. Kudos to teacher-scholars. The last major item on the agenda was that I came up with a pretty hefty list of questions that I want to be sure to ask during my visit--this visit is very much about information seeking for me, so I want to be sure all my questions get answered. I'm feeling very neutral about the whole process--I think its going to take a few more days for nerves and adrenaline to kick in. Maybe after I nail down this talk this weekend. We'll see.
More Revisions--Job Talk
I'm just revising away this week. I got through Advisor #1's changes last night. It's going to take a few more days to tackle the requests of Advisor #2, who is on this citation rampage with my work. She was kind enough to indicate that she may have gone overboard about wanting citations and that I could ignore some of her requests. Whew. But I haven't been in the scholarly literature of my diss for a while so it will be good to work in the trenches for a few days.
In the meantime, I'm awaiting more news from Campus Visit School to find out what topic I should be teaching on for my presentation. And I'm thinking that I'm going to spend the weekend working on my job talk. I have a rough idea of what I want to do in my mind, but I need to discuss it more with Advisor #2 who is the job search guru. The school wants to hear about completed research, dissertation update, and future research, so I'm thinking about a past-present-future approach. Something like that. I'm anxious to get to work on it so I may start today...
In the meantime, I'm awaiting more news from Campus Visit School to find out what topic I should be teaching on for my presentation. And I'm thinking that I'm going to spend the weekend working on my job talk. I have a rough idea of what I want to do in my mind, but I need to discuss it more with Advisor #2 who is the job search guru. The school wants to hear about completed research, dissertation update, and future research, so I'm thinking about a past-present-future approach. Something like that. I'm anxious to get to work on it so I may start today...
Research Award!!
I am feeling so blessed this evening. Just when I needed it most, I received an email letting me know that I've received a Top Student Paper Award for one of the papers I'm presenting at this month's Major Conference. I've never received an award at this conference so I am just THRILLED. What a wonderful way to start the month!! Since you all keep insisting that I need to celebrate, I think I will!!
One More Out My System
Ok, this application thing has to stop. I just sent out one more. I think having all these deadlines over my head has been extremely distracting to my writing (although I did do some revising tonight also--felt good). Part of me is pushing to complete them so I can get back to my normal so called life.
So I sent out the one postdoc that was due in November. It was an eletronic submission, so barring the "I wonder if they'll get it"-cyber-anxiety, it felt good to get that off my desk. I've decided to jettison the next two postdocs that are due, neither of which are located anywhere I'm really prepared to live (even for just a year). Taking those two out of the mix means that (in theory), I don't have to even think about a postdoc application until mid-December. That clears out November for me to get ready for my first campus visit, pull together this dissertation stuff, and get geared for the national conference. Those three things are more than enough to keep me occupied this month.
So one more out--one more opportunity to be not as broke as I am right now. Exciting stuff.
The waiting continues.
So I sent out the one postdoc that was due in November. It was an eletronic submission, so barring the "I wonder if they'll get it"-cyber-anxiety, it felt good to get that off my desk. I've decided to jettison the next two postdocs that are due, neither of which are located anywhere I'm really prepared to live (even for just a year). Taking those two out of the mix means that (in theory), I don't have to even think about a postdoc application until mid-December. That clears out November for me to get ready for my first campus visit, pull together this dissertation stuff, and get geared for the national conference. Those three things are more than enough to keep me occupied this month.
So one more out--one more opportunity to be not as broke as I am right now. Exciting stuff.
The waiting continues.
All Gone!
The assistant professor applications are officially complete. I put the remaining applications in the mail this morning and I am D O N E with that part of my job search. Feels good to have that out of my hands for a little while. Now the wait begins. Sigh.
On to revisions
....the job talk
....the teaching presentation
....oh yeah and Fourth Chapter.
On to revisions
....the job talk
....the teaching presentation
....oh yeah and Fourth Chapter.
Sleepy Sunday
Today was truly a day of rest. No regrets about the good sleep--just positive plans for the week to come. Two major things to tackle--revisions on the diss and working on my presentations for my upcoming campus visit.
Until Monday--more rest.
Until Monday--more rest.
Done with Job Hunt--Phase I
Well almost. I've finished all five of my letters. But I just realized one of the positions is for a non-tenure track job so I'm pulling that one. I must have completely read over that in the ad. Sigh. Monday will be the official end to the first half of my job "hunt" when I put these applications in the mail! Total number of asst. prof. positions applied for to date: 10.
Shortly, but not today and probably not this week, Phase II of the process will begin with the hunt for a postdoc. Given the increasing number of job ads I've applied for, I'm thinking that I will cut the number of postdocs down to the ones I REALLY want/can't pass on. Anticipated postdoc applications: 5 or 6 (I'm still debating one)
Got some good work done today--I'm pleased about that. But unfortunately my allergies have been acting up all day and I had to take some medicine. I'm incredibly groggy now--I'll have to start in on dissertation revisions tomorrow.
Shortly, but not today and probably not this week, Phase II of the process will begin with the hunt for a postdoc. Given the increasing number of job ads I've applied for, I'm thinking that I will cut the number of postdocs down to the ones I REALLY want/can't pass on. Anticipated postdoc applications: 5 or 6 (I'm still debating one)
Got some good work done today--I'm pleased about that. But unfortunately my allergies have been acting up all day and I had to take some medicine. I'm incredibly groggy now--I'll have to start in on dissertation revisions tomorrow.
Revising Day
In the spirit of this morning's quiz, today is all about revisions. My last five cover letters for assistant professor positions are now drafted and in need of polishing. At least four are pretty close to completion and just need proofing. The fifth one still needs a little work. Hopefully the whole endeavor won't take more than two hours.
Rest of the day--dissertation revisions. I am going to spend all day and probably all tomorrow evening revising Chapters One through Three. My advisors sent me some good comments so I am hoping to get myself back in dissertation mode by going through them. I'm praying that this will be good momentum to get me into Fourth Chapter on Monday.
Rest of the day--dissertation revisions. I am going to spend all day and probably all tomorrow evening revising Chapters One through Three. My advisors sent me some good comments so I am hoping to get myself back in dissertation mode by going through them. I'm praying that this will be good momentum to get me into Fourth Chapter on Monday.
How Did They Know??
Ok, the picture is ALL wrong, but,
You are a Revisionist Historian. You are the Clark
Kent of postmodernists. You probably want to
work in a library or in social services. No
one suspects you of being a postmodernist...
until they read your publications!
What kind of postmodernist are you!?
brought to you by Quizilla
(seen it on dr. b's spot)
This one is just too true. Now how the questions and my answers added up to this, I'm not smart enough to know. But I did go into academe because of my first seminar in history of public address as an undergraduate. The class focused on histories and historiography and it was the first space in which I was able to research a question I'd had all my life up to that point--where are the Black women in "history"?? I've been writing histories ever since. Pretty neat quiz....
You are a Revisionist Historian. You are the Clark
Kent of postmodernists. You probably want to
work in a library or in social services. No
one suspects you of being a postmodernist...
until they read your publications!
What kind of postmodernist are you!?
brought to you by Quizilla
(seen it on dr. b's spot)
This one is just too true. Now how the questions and my answers added up to this, I'm not smart enough to know. But I did go into academe because of my first seminar in history of public address as an undergraduate. The class focused on histories and historiography and it was the first space in which I was able to research a question I'd had all my life up to that point--where are the Black women in "history"?? I've been writing histories ever since. Pretty neat quiz....
Good Week
Personally, mentally, professionally, this has been a good week. My trip to the mountains was EXCELLENT. Just getting settled back in--little tired--but feeling very invigorated to get some work done.
I'm finally feeling like I'm getting a handle on this job search--I don't feel stressed about it anymore and I'm getting in gear for my first campus visit. I'm going to get a few more applications ready over the weekend to go out on Monday (I'm thinking at least four more). And most importantly, this weekend I will get back into the groove of the most important thing I should be doing right now, my dissertation. I need to spend some serious time on my revisions. My advisor put some things in the mail to me so I need to handle that ASAP. Then I can get back to Fourth Chapter. I'm behind on it, but as long as I can get that tackled before National Conference in November, I'll feel okay.
Time to focus.
I'm finally feeling like I'm getting a handle on this job search--I don't feel stressed about it anymore and I'm getting in gear for my first campus visit. I'm going to get a few more applications ready over the weekend to go out on Monday (I'm thinking at least four more). And most importantly, this weekend I will get back into the groove of the most important thing I should be doing right now, my dissertation. I need to spend some serious time on my revisions. My advisor put some things in the mail to me so I need to handle that ASAP. Then I can get back to Fourth Chapter. I'm behind on it, but as long as I can get that tackled before National Conference in November, I'll feel okay.
Time to focus.
On Location
Applications-Applications-Applications. I've been focusing probably a little more than I would like to on my applications; I've sent four out this week and I'm feeling very good about that. Four more to go this week, and then I'll be starting to switch gears to work on my postdoc applications.
Sigh.
I'm writing on location--taking a little break this week in the mountains. It's cold outside, but I'm staying warm and enjoying this time to myself....More writing when I get back to the South.
Sigh.
I'm writing on location--taking a little break this week in the mountains. It's cold outside, but I'm staying warm and enjoying this time to myself....More writing when I get back to the South.
Working Weekend
Well, Wilma rained on my plans to be in Florida tomorrow. I was looking forward to a week of writing in the Florida sun. But I've found a much more appealing Plan B for travel so I'm still going to get out of the house and write on location for a few days. And yes, it's top secret--I don't want anybody botherin me.
This weekend is another fun-filled writing weekend. Goals are simple:
--Finish reading those autobiographies!!
--Finish research cover letters to send out applications on Monday morning!
--Create interdisciplinary letter so it can go out by Friday!
--Start Chapter 1-3 revisions.
--Pack for the roadtrip.
Pretty straightforward weekend. Let's see how much I can get done!
This weekend is another fun-filled writing weekend. Goals are simple:
--Finish reading those autobiographies!!
--Finish research cover letters to send out applications on Monday morning!
--Create interdisciplinary letter so it can go out by Friday!
--Start Chapter 1-3 revisions.
--Pack for the roadtrip.
Pretty straightforward weekend. Let's see how much I can get done!
Being Scholarly/Being Me
It's a difficult thing, I think, to be a young academic. I'm still enjoying life in the "real world" and I find it demanding sometimes to live up to the expectations of being "scholarly." So generally speaking, I don't--I'm just me. Sometimes silly, sometimes cool, sometimes poetic, always still me. Fortunately, I'm a nerd so it's not too hard to be scholarly sometimes too.
But lately, I've needed an extra push to be scholarly. Today's push came from Dr. John, a generous soul and my kindred academic spirit. He asked me to look over some work he has in progress for a pub., and I found myself quite engaged in his writing. Completely different field, completely different style (manual) and approach, but absolutely riveting. And arguably, Dr. J's work has a lot more real world application than my own, and I'm always inspired by scholarship that does something. Editing was a good scholarly activity and gave me a good filter through which to internalize the advice I was giving out as well as the advice I've been getting lately. So I've been building on this scholarly momentum, courtesy of Dr. John's very exciting and forthcoming article, and I'm back to the grind of my cover letters. I'm still perfecting the research letter. My advisors near and far have weighed in, and again comes the tension--to be scholarly while still being me.
I am admittedly a storyteller, especially when I write. My undergraduate advisor once described my writing style as paratactical (or some similar Greek word I cannot define or spell with any confidence), and told me that my writing tended to pull my reader from the beginning of the story to the end. Not necessarily linear, but more circular in nature (even though a circle is a line too). She warned me that some scholars would be suspicious of the seductive nature of my writing, and that the dominant (patriarchal!) desire for a more linear style might lead to some future criticisms and rejections. And this is true, people generally love the way I write, but often there is a curmudgeon who won't flow with me. So whenever I write for "scholarly" outlets, I always find myself checking to make sure I am writing in my own voice, and I'm always resisting in some way the push to change. Usually this process occurs quietly in my brain, but today the battle has been noisy.
Most of the scholars I invited to critique my most recent letter gave me the same advice. Express your ideas with more confidence, reduce the touchy-feeling language, clean up the grammar, etc. But one categorically eliminated the story-telling nature of my letter. This reviewer completely cut out my voice, and recommended that I subscribe to a more conventional form of letter-writing which boiled down to introduction, dissertation paragraph, additional scholarship/pubs., teaching, conclusion. I read, re-read, and I'm still reading the comments. This is a person whom I admire GREATLY, and who has supported me from Jump. So there has been a very vocal discussion in my brain all day--do I go the scholarly route or do I work to keep what is mine?? On a previous letter, this reviewer had said that my "anecdotes were colorful, but the letter was too long." Here again, the push is to cut, compress, and conform. And I'm resisting.
At the end of the day, I've decided to keep my letter as is. For better or worse, the writing style in my letter is a very strong representation of my scholarship. It's clear. It's colorful. It's personal. It's powerful. It's me.
But lately, I've needed an extra push to be scholarly. Today's push came from Dr. John, a generous soul and my kindred academic spirit. He asked me to look over some work he has in progress for a pub., and I found myself quite engaged in his writing. Completely different field, completely different style (manual) and approach, but absolutely riveting. And arguably, Dr. J's work has a lot more real world application than my own, and I'm always inspired by scholarship that does something. Editing was a good scholarly activity and gave me a good filter through which to internalize the advice I was giving out as well as the advice I've been getting lately. So I've been building on this scholarly momentum, courtesy of Dr. John's very exciting and forthcoming article, and I'm back to the grind of my cover letters. I'm still perfecting the research letter. My advisors near and far have weighed in, and again comes the tension--to be scholarly while still being me.
I am admittedly a storyteller, especially when I write. My undergraduate advisor once described my writing style as paratactical (or some similar Greek word I cannot define or spell with any confidence), and told me that my writing tended to pull my reader from the beginning of the story to the end. Not necessarily linear, but more circular in nature (even though a circle is a line too). She warned me that some scholars would be suspicious of the seductive nature of my writing, and that the dominant (patriarchal!) desire for a more linear style might lead to some future criticisms and rejections. And this is true, people generally love the way I write, but often there is a curmudgeon who won't flow with me. So whenever I write for "scholarly" outlets, I always find myself checking to make sure I am writing in my own voice, and I'm always resisting in some way the push to change. Usually this process occurs quietly in my brain, but today the battle has been noisy.
Most of the scholars I invited to critique my most recent letter gave me the same advice. Express your ideas with more confidence, reduce the touchy-feeling language, clean up the grammar, etc. But one categorically eliminated the story-telling nature of my letter. This reviewer completely cut out my voice, and recommended that I subscribe to a more conventional form of letter-writing which boiled down to introduction, dissertation paragraph, additional scholarship/pubs., teaching, conclusion. I read, re-read, and I'm still reading the comments. This is a person whom I admire GREATLY, and who has supported me from Jump. So there has been a very vocal discussion in my brain all day--do I go the scholarly route or do I work to keep what is mine?? On a previous letter, this reviewer had said that my "anecdotes were colorful, but the letter was too long." Here again, the push is to cut, compress, and conform. And I'm resisting.
At the end of the day, I've decided to keep my letter as is. For better or worse, the writing style in my letter is a very strong representation of my scholarship. It's clear. It's colorful. It's personal. It's powerful. It's me.
Wilma
The women of the storm season have been serious. Wilma has shut down my plans to go to Florida this week coming up. I'm sad, but I'm safe, so not complainin. Just gotta come up with some alternate plans--I was looking forward to going mobile with the diss. Some impressive pictures of Wilma here.
I'm Still Smart
Early morning reminder of my intelligence (or lack thereof).
I'm not a morning person--I rarely do any writing in the morning because of it. Actually I rarely do much of anything in the morning besides roll over. Most people who know me know that I say good morning around 12 noon. But seeing that my hair was becoming quite unruly, I gathered all my energy to get my hair managed this morning. 8:30 in the AM. Gracious. The last time I got up for an 8:30 appt. on any regular basis was for Freshman Biology--and even that was a tag-team effort. (Story for another day). But my motivation to get up this early was high for a number of reasons. 1) My regular stylist, who is really the only man on earth I trust with my hair, is not working this week, therefore 2) I wanted to get up extra early to check out this new place my mom recommended to me, so 3) Since it is a Black hair salon, I wanted to get in before the normal rush to make sure the stylist had plenty of time and could concentrate on my hair. Nothing worse than an hair accident during rush hour--you're mad, you're annoyed, and you're stuck in your seat for another two or three hours at least.
So I walk into this really cute shop--I must say it's one of the nicest hair salons I've been in down here with mostly reasonable prices. As soon as I walk in and introduce myself, the stylist recognizes me--"you're Mon #1's daughter, aren't you." So we go through the Southern song and dance--"yes ma'am"--"you look just like her"--"yes ma'am"--"I haven't seen you in years, you are still so tiny"--"yes ma'am." But this stylist added a new hook to the song--"I hear you are still smart." (Record screeches to a halt in the background). Still smart?
Why is it that whenever you add the word "still" to something, the statement becomes a pseudo-question. You still short. You still pretty. You still look good. You still fat. You still married. You still at that job. I remember the first time I heard an older woman say to a friend of mine, "Girl, you still got them big 'ol hips I see." 1) Where were they supposed to go and 2) She lives with them every day so I'm sure she didn't need you to point them out. So apparently, I'm still smart. And for the record, I'm still Black, I'm still tiny, I'm still broke, and I'm still standing. And I'm ok with that.
**Oh and my hair. Going early was great--I was in and out in a little over an hour which is an hour less than normal. The end result looks good--but the technique was not great--I'm used to getting my hair whacked off, but I don't usually feel the whacking part....**
I'm not a morning person--I rarely do any writing in the morning because of it. Actually I rarely do much of anything in the morning besides roll over. Most people who know me know that I say good morning around 12 noon. But seeing that my hair was becoming quite unruly, I gathered all my energy to get my hair managed this morning. 8:30 in the AM. Gracious. The last time I got up for an 8:30 appt. on any regular basis was for Freshman Biology--and even that was a tag-team effort. (Story for another day). But my motivation to get up this early was high for a number of reasons. 1) My regular stylist, who is really the only man on earth I trust with my hair, is not working this week, therefore 2) I wanted to get up extra early to check out this new place my mom recommended to me, so 3) Since it is a Black hair salon, I wanted to get in before the normal rush to make sure the stylist had plenty of time and could concentrate on my hair. Nothing worse than an hair accident during rush hour--you're mad, you're annoyed, and you're stuck in your seat for another two or three hours at least.
So I walk into this really cute shop--I must say it's one of the nicest hair salons I've been in down here with mostly reasonable prices. As soon as I walk in and introduce myself, the stylist recognizes me--"you're Mon #1's daughter, aren't you." So we go through the Southern song and dance--"yes ma'am"--"you look just like her"--"yes ma'am"--"I haven't seen you in years, you are still so tiny"--"yes ma'am." But this stylist added a new hook to the song--"I hear you are still smart." (Record screeches to a halt in the background). Still smart?
Why is it that whenever you add the word "still" to something, the statement becomes a pseudo-question. You still short. You still pretty. You still look good. You still fat. You still married. You still at that job. I remember the first time I heard an older woman say to a friend of mine, "Girl, you still got them big 'ol hips I see." 1) Where were they supposed to go and 2) She lives with them every day so I'm sure she didn't need you to point them out. So apparently, I'm still smart. And for the record, I'm still Black, I'm still tiny, I'm still broke, and I'm still standing. And I'm ok with that.
**Oh and my hair. Going early was great--I was in and out in a little over an hour which is an hour less than normal. The end result looks good--but the technique was not great--I'm used to getting my hair whacked off, but I don't usually feel the whacking part....**
Going on the Market, Con Accent
Today I had a good talk with one of my dissertation advisors about my diss and about my job prospects. She and I mostly converse via email, so it was nice to connect via phone again. And the first thing she says to me--"I love the accent." It's been at least 10 years since I've been told I have an accent and apparently, "it's cute." I knew that being home was rubbing off on me, my rate of speech is faster and the tone of my voice is higher at times--but I hadn't thought about the accent part. I'm cool with it now and in many ways it was a nice compliment. When I was younger, I took pride in the fact that everyone told me I didn't sound like a Southerner--I hated being from the South as a kid. But the longer I was away from home for my degrees, the more I missed the South and the more I identified with being a Southerner. Now the Southeast feels like home, and for the first time, I'm ready to embrace an important marker of being home--the good ol' Southern accent.
BUT
I had not thought about being on the market with an accent--especially a "cute" one. As if I didn't have enough markers of difference already. As I mentioned previously in Becoming a Professor, there are quite a few issues that prospective faculty of color must consider. Now consider the various perceptions, misconceptions, and potential exoticism of a (cute) Southern accent. Granted, this issue could never be as severe as the challenges faced by non-native English speakers. But the compliment I received today is a good conversation starter for thinking about social roles and stereotypes. I wonder if this is still an issue in today's society. The issues of accent/voice relates to my post from yesterday on women in leadership. Studies of women politicians and women in corporate leadership have shown that women with high, "cute" voices are not taken as seriously as women with more low tones in their voice. Do you notice that sports networks rarely hire women with higher voices as anchors--if you're a woman with a high voice you are (literally) on the sidelines. But anyways, it strikes me that theremight still be some residual stereotype that someone who sounds too "cute" is therefore not intellectual. Have we, as contemporary forward-thinking academics, transcended that?? I wonder.
BUT
I had not thought about being on the market with an accent--especially a "cute" one. As if I didn't have enough markers of difference already. As I mentioned previously in Becoming a Professor, there are quite a few issues that prospective faculty of color must consider. Now consider the various perceptions, misconceptions, and potential exoticism of a (cute) Southern accent. Granted, this issue could never be as severe as the challenges faced by non-native English speakers. But the compliment I received today is a good conversation starter for thinking about social roles and stereotypes. I wonder if this is still an issue in today's society. The issues of accent/voice relates to my post from yesterday on women in leadership. Studies of women politicians and women in corporate leadership have shown that women with high, "cute" voices are not taken as seriously as women with more low tones in their voice. Do you notice that sports networks rarely hire women with higher voices as anchors--if you're a woman with a high voice you are (literally) on the sidelines. But anyways, it strikes me that theremight still be some residual stereotype that someone who sounds too "cute" is therefore not intellectual. Have we, as contemporary forward-thinking academics, transcended that?? I wonder.
What's a Girl Gotta Do
Ok, too much dissertation on the brain. Yes I study women in leadership so I'm biased, but I'm disturbed that there are virtually no women in this "famous leader" quiz. Of course, when I took the quiz they said I was the woman so I looked to see what other options there were. No other women. Very disappointing but leads to some important questions for me...
What does a woman have to do to be considered a "leader"? If this quiz defined it--apparently you have to practically be a saint. Who are the women we most commonly associate with leadership? What do they have in common?
Obviously, these quiz is not serious and the images invoked are iconic. But maybe my real question is--why aren't more women iconic images of leaders? I mean for me, I would think that Harriett Tubman for example would be a great icon of leadership. Leadership in the face of adversity--leadership for the cause of freedom--hallmarks of iconic leadership right?? Why is it that we still have a such hard time seeing women in the public role? I mean look at all the flack Hillary and Condoleezza get compared to their male counterparts-and they do even have to "do" anything--just existing seems to be enough to send someone on a talking heads rampage. The days in which women could not speak in public have long passed in most of the world, but still here in the US there is still a resistance to see women as leaders. Why???
What does a woman have to do to be considered a "leader"? If this quiz defined it--apparently you have to practically be a saint. Who are the women we most commonly associate with leadership? What do they have in common?
Obviously, these quiz is not serious and the images invoked are iconic. But maybe my real question is--why aren't more women iconic images of leaders? I mean for me, I would think that Harriett Tubman for example would be a great icon of leadership. Leadership in the face of adversity--leadership for the cause of freedom--hallmarks of iconic leadership right?? Why is it that we still have a such hard time seeing women in the public role? I mean look at all the flack Hillary and Condoleezza get compared to their male counterparts-and they do even have to "do" anything--just existing seems to be enough to send someone on a talking heads rampage. The days in which women could not speak in public have long passed in most of the world, but still here in the US there is still a resistance to see women as leaders. Why???
Getting Back on Track
Getting a campus invite has really stunted my progress on other things. But finally, I got a little wind tonight to plow away on these cover letters. So far I have the major research school letter done--on to the interdisciplinary one.
My Tip of the Week: Being on the market while writing a diss is no fun. Back to work.
My Tip of the Week: Being on the market while writing a diss is no fun. Back to work.
Going to Campus
It's (almost) official. I'm going to my first campus. Fresh on the market and I'm going to a campus. I'm stunned to say the least. I've been trying to focus on writing for the past couple days, but my mind is racing. Gotta work up a research presentation and a teaching demo. Gotta find out what I need. Gotta open up some days in my schedule. Gotta go shopping. Gotta breathe.
I have to get some writing done this week. I am completely out of my rhythm right now and it is annoying me. Fourth Chapter is calling. I'm carrying around the autobiographies I need to read and I often open the pages--but reading hasn't been happening a lot lately. I have a lot of family stuff going on right now that is not helping me to focus, but I MUST get it together this week. Gotta breathe.
I have to get some writing done this week. I am completely out of my rhythm right now and it is annoying me. Fourth Chapter is calling. I'm carrying around the autobiographies I need to read and I often open the pages--but reading hasn't been happening a lot lately. I have a lot of family stuff going on right now that is not helping me to focus, but I MUST get it together this week. Gotta breathe.
Needs Meme
I should be in bed. So why not do my first meme. As seen on CultureCat--Do a Google search for "[Your first name] needs":
Mon needs little introduction.
Mon needs her family and her friends.
Mon needs to do something with that hair. (quite true)
Mon needs to cut her hair. (i get it!)
Mon needs to lose 10 kgs. (i'd disappear)
Mon needs an urban tattoo. (ummmm, no)
Mon needs to rest again. (can it wait until after the PhD)
Mon needs a meal. (who you tellin)
Mon needs a cook. (even better)
Mon needs prayer. (always)
Mon needs a job. (sigh)
Mon needs to do what's in her best interests. (Amen!)
Mon needs to shine. (perfect)
Mon NEEDS to go to sleep.
Mon needs little introduction.
Mon needs her family and her friends.
Mon needs to do something with that hair. (quite true)
Mon needs to cut her hair. (i get it!)
Mon needs to lose 10 kgs. (i'd disappear)
Mon needs an urban tattoo. (ummmm, no)
Mon needs to rest again. (can it wait until after the PhD)
Mon needs a meal. (who you tellin)
Mon needs a cook. (even better)
Mon needs prayer. (always)
Mon needs a job. (sigh)
Mon needs to do what's in her best interests. (Amen!)
Mon needs to shine. (perfect)
Mon NEEDS to go to sleep.
Frankie Works, I Don't
Tonight I'm thinking about people who do real work. Even though I'm up at 2:00AM writing on my dissertation, I've been told that this is not real work--well more accurately, this is not a real job. After much internal debate, I've decided to defer to my good friend Frankie who has a real job. Several of them as a matter of fact. Actually, at one point recently, Frankie had four jobs--two full-time jobs and two part-time jobs. How is that possible? Even she hasn't figured that out yet--she's still recovering from the intermittent periods of falling asleep--fully dressed--kneeled by the couch--with all the lights in her place, on.
Back to the point. Frankie is a young, vibrant, single woman. She's not raising any Bebe's kids--she's not taking money from one credit card to pay another--she's not spending excessive amounts of cash on men, booze, or drugs. She's just regular people with regular bills. And the reality is that regular people have to go to work everyday (and sometimes more than once a day). Frankie is a young professional with a new(ish) car and aspirations of returning back to graduate school so she can go into Higher Ed administration. Good for you Frankie. In the meantime, she holds down several (not sure how many she has at the moment) important jobs--helping real people with real issues. And no, I'm not being sarcastic--you just knew I was about to say she works at McDonalds right. No, I really mean it, Frankie helps people. Abuse, mental illness, physical and emotional handicaps, Frankie has seen it all. That my friends is real work. That is a real job. Frankie is a beautiful person for going back to her job every day. Some people couldn't do it. I wish she could see the strength that she has inside her--I see it--it's real, she's real, her work is real. Let's have a reality show that follows Frankie around. Now that's some reality instead of some kids having $400,000+ Super Sweet Sixteen Parties--because that ish AIN'T real.
And on another note--Hollywood and Reality TV ain't got NOTHING on Frankie's parents. They recently celebrated their 44th wedding anniversary. 44 years of real marriage and real beautiful Black love at that. Now that too, is real work.
So after years of fighting, tonight after much consideration, I concede. Frankie, you are right. I do not have a real job and I do not do real work.
(So quit your gloatin, and get back to work--cuz I know you on somebody's clock right now. Love you soror!)
Back to the point. Frankie is a young, vibrant, single woman. She's not raising any Bebe's kids--she's not taking money from one credit card to pay another--she's not spending excessive amounts of cash on men, booze, or drugs. She's just regular people with regular bills. And the reality is that regular people have to go to work everyday (and sometimes more than once a day). Frankie is a young professional with a new(ish) car and aspirations of returning back to graduate school so she can go into Higher Ed administration. Good for you Frankie. In the meantime, she holds down several (not sure how many she has at the moment) important jobs--helping real people with real issues. And no, I'm not being sarcastic--you just knew I was about to say she works at McDonalds right. No, I really mean it, Frankie helps people. Abuse, mental illness, physical and emotional handicaps, Frankie has seen it all. That my friends is real work. That is a real job. Frankie is a beautiful person for going back to her job every day. Some people couldn't do it. I wish she could see the strength that she has inside her--I see it--it's real, she's real, her work is real. Let's have a reality show that follows Frankie around. Now that's some reality instead of some kids having $400,000+ Super Sweet Sixteen Parties--because that ish AIN'T real.
And on another note--Hollywood and Reality TV ain't got NOTHING on Frankie's parents. They recently celebrated their 44th wedding anniversary. 44 years of real marriage and real beautiful Black love at that. Now that too, is real work.
So after years of fighting, tonight after much consideration, I concede. Frankie, you are right. I do not have a real job and I do not do real work.
(So quit your gloatin, and get back to work--cuz I know you on somebody's clock right now. Love you soror!)
Commemorative Stamp for Hattie McDaniel
In early 2006, the USPS Black Heritage Series will issue a new stamp in the honor of Hattie McDaniel, the first African American to win an Academy Award. I'm happy to learn that Sigma Gamma Rho will be a part of the work to honor our distinguished soror, and I wish I could be in Chicago for the unveiling event this weekend. (The man in all the movies, Terrence Howard, is scheduled to be a part of the unveiling). Kudos to Sigma's International Grand Basileus, Dr. Mynora J. Bryant, my dear International First Grand Anti-Basileus, Joann Loveless, Soror Frances Frazier, and everyone in this important tribute.
I recently read that there is a new scholarly monograph out on Hattie McDaniel, and that the author has been working to recover Soror McDaniel's missing Academy Award. I will have to check out that book for my next "fun" reading project. I would love to use something on McDaniel for a future course...
I recently read that there is a new scholarly monograph out on Hattie McDaniel, and that the author has been working to recover Soror McDaniel's missing Academy Award. I will have to check out that book for my next "fun" reading project. I would love to use something on McDaniel for a future course...
Back on the Blog
For whatever reason, I needed a break from the blog. Things are well here. Third Chapter is DONE. I'm proofreading it today and I'll send it out later. I finished up my "real" website, and although I want to make some changes to the design, I'm not going to mess with it anymore for a while.
I think my hiatus from the blog has been largely to keep myself from going on and on about recent developments in my professional life. I've received some excellent feedback on my first application, and I'm being moved along in the job search process. I am going to respect the process and not go on about it here. But I'm happy to be getting a bite even though I'm a young ABD'r. I think this speaks well for the future. We'll see what happens. (Thanks for all the encouraging notes on my applications!)
In the meantime--I'm proofreading today. Shoulda done it this weekend but I was tending to the professional stuff. Starting on Fourth Chapter tomorrow. I have a draft started (about 20+ pages), but I need to go back and read the two texts that the chapter centers on. The focus of this chapter is on two autobiographies written by an African American woman politician. I haven't read them in a while so that will get me started back.
Still need to work on my dissertation abstract and get cranking on my next round of cover letters. I have 3 applications due at the end of the month--more cover letter fun!! YEAH!!
I think my hiatus from the blog has been largely to keep myself from going on and on about recent developments in my professional life. I've received some excellent feedback on my first application, and I'm being moved along in the job search process. I am going to respect the process and not go on about it here. But I'm happy to be getting a bite even though I'm a young ABD'r. I think this speaks well for the future. We'll see what happens. (Thanks for all the encouraging notes on my applications!)
In the meantime--I'm proofreading today. Shoulda done it this weekend but I was tending to the professional stuff. Starting on Fourth Chapter tomorrow. I have a draft started (about 20+ pages), but I need to go back and read the two texts that the chapter centers on. The focus of this chapter is on two autobiographies written by an African American woman politician. I haven't read them in a while so that will get me started back.
Still need to work on my dissertation abstract and get cranking on my next round of cover letters. I have 3 applications due at the end of the month--more cover letter fun!! YEAH!!
Two Applications OUT!!
It's rainy, it's cloudy, some tropical storm type weather here. But I am having a sunny day. My teaching portfolio is bound and looking nice (simple, clean, professional if you ask me). And more importantly, my first two job applications are in the mail. For the next 6 positions or so, I only need to write cover letters. I made copies of all the additional teaching materials I need and I have my transcripts, so all I have to do between now and November is write some more letters. Fun. Then I'll start writing research statements/plans for my postdocs. More fun.
But no raining on my parade. I'm happy to have those two things off my list. The good people at USPS promise delivery of my applications by Friday so I am happily ahead of the deadline. Yeah me. Back to work on Third Chapter now...
But no raining on my parade. I'm happy to have those two things off my list. The good people at USPS promise delivery of my applications by Friday so I am happily ahead of the deadline. Yeah me. Back to work on Third Chapter now...
Well You Betta Work Hard
Finally, that teaching portfolio is done and going off to the presses. My writing sample is all picked out, printed out, and ready to go. In the morning, I'll make a trip to a printer and see quickly I can get this portfolio put together. If I can get it done tomorrow, my first two applications will be in the mail tomorrow. Tomorrow is a D-Day (Deadline Day) -- Third Chapter is going out the door too....
I'm feeling so good right now, I thought I'd take a time out for a little story about the hard work of being an academic for those in the listening audience...
My mother, God Bless Her Nonacademic Soul, looked over my portfolio materials this evening. I had charts and graphs for my teaching evaluation data and piles and piles of paper. Now perhaps it is because my mother knows that I work in words and not in numbers that she put on airs of being impressed.
"You did all this?" she asks, looking at me sideways with skepticism.
"Yes, mother, I told you I've been really working on this portfolio," I reply, feigning to be hurt by her disbelief.
She pauses, flips some pages, and states in a way only a Southern Black woman can, "Well...You BETTA work hard." Because of course, her eyes say, she hasn't raised me to do otherwise.
"I'm doin my best mom."
She hands me back the thick wad of papers and smiles--"Good." I find comfort in her finality, not feeling in the mood to answer the "when you going to send off some more chapters" inquiries.
But as I turn to get my things together to go, she reminds me why Nonacademic Souls are often wiser than Academic ones.
"They ain't gonna read all that stuff are they." Not a question, but a statement.
"No mom," I sigh defeatedly, "probably not."
I'm feeling so good right now, I thought I'd take a time out for a little story about the hard work of being an academic for those in the listening audience...
My mother, God Bless Her Nonacademic Soul, looked over my portfolio materials this evening. I had charts and graphs for my teaching evaluation data and piles and piles of paper. Now perhaps it is because my mother knows that I work in words and not in numbers that she put on airs of being impressed.
"You did all this?" she asks, looking at me sideways with skepticism.
"Yes, mother, I told you I've been really working on this portfolio," I reply, feigning to be hurt by her disbelief.
She pauses, flips some pages, and states in a way only a Southern Black woman can, "Well...You BETTA work hard." Because of course, her eyes say, she hasn't raised me to do otherwise.
"I'm doin my best mom."
She hands me back the thick wad of papers and smiles--"Good." I find comfort in her finality, not feeling in the mood to answer the "when you going to send off some more chapters" inquiries.
But as I turn to get my things together to go, she reminds me why Nonacademic Souls are often wiser than Academic ones.
"They ain't gonna read all that stuff are they." Not a question, but a statement.
"No mom," I sigh defeatedly, "probably not."
Close Call
I made checklists for all of my job applications, but realized tonight that I left an item off my checklist for the Job #1 application--a writing sample. This Job #1 application package is going to be the death of me. I keep telling myself it will be easier from here on out, but it seems like my thickest package is the one that has to go out first. The Job #2 call only asks for a letter and a CV, but Job #1 wants everything plus some Bi-Lo coupons. Nevertheless, disaster avoided. I'm tinkering over this portfolio (STILL) and then I need to decide on a writing sample.
Constance Baker Motley
This is out of my usual routine, but I want to dedicate some space to important woman who has passed away.
From _The New York Times_, September 29, 2005
Constance Baker Motley, Civil Rights Trailblazer, Dies at 84
By DOUGLAS MARTIN
Constance Baker Motley, a civil rights lawyer who fought nearly every important civil rights case for two decades and then became the first black woman to serve as a federal judge, died yesterday at NYU Downtown Hospital in Manhattan. She was 84.
The cause was congestive heart failure, said Isolde Motley, her daughter-in-law.
Judge Motley was the first black woman to serve in the New York State Senate, as well as the first woman to be Manhattan borough president, a position that guaranteed her a voice in running the entire city under an earlier system of local government called the Board of Estimate.
Judge Motley was at the center of the firestorm that raged through the South in the two decades after World War II, as blacks and their white allies pressed to end the segregation that had gripped the region since Reconstruction. She visited the Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. in jail, sang freedom songs in churches that had been bombed, and spent a night under armed guard with Medgar Evers, the civil rights leader who was later murdered.
But her métier was in the quieter, painstaking preparation and presentation of lawsuits that paved the way to fuller societal participation by blacks. She dressed elegantly, spoke in a low, lilting voice and, in case after case, earned a reputation as the chief courtroom tactician of the civil rights movement.
Gov. George C. Wallace of Alabama and other staunch segregationists yielded, kicking and screaming, to the verdicts of courts ruling against racial segregation. These huge victories were led by the N.A.A.C.P.'s Legal Defense and Education Fund, led by Thurgood Marshall, for which Judge Motley, Jack Greenberg, Robert Carter and a handful of other underpaid, overworked lawyers labored.
In particular, she directed the legal campaign that resulted in the admission of James H. Meredith to the University of Mississippi in 1962. She argued 10 cases before the United States Supreme Court and won nine of them.
Judge Motley won cases that ended segregation in Memphis restaurants and at whites-only lunch counters in Birmingham, Ala. She fought for King's right to march in Albany, Ga. She played an important role in representing blacks seeking admission to the Universities of Florida, Georgia Alabama and Mississippi and Clemson College in South Carolina.
She helped write briefs in the landmark school desegregation case Brown v. Board of Education in 1954 and in later elementary-school integration cases.
Judge Motley was a tall, gracious and stately woman whose oft-stated goal was as simple as it was sometimes elusive: dignity for all people. Her personal approach was also dignified. When a reporter wrote that she had demanded some action by the court, she soon corrected him:
"What do you mean 'I demanded the court'? You don't demand, you pray for relief or move for some action."
Charlayne Hunter-Gault, whose admission to the University of Georgia was engineered by Mrs. Motley's legal finesse, described her courtroom cunning.
"Mrs. Motley's style could be deceptive, often challenging a witness to get away with one lie after another without challenging them," she wrote in her book "In My Place," published in 1992. "It was as if she would lull them into an affirmation of their own arrogance, causing them to relax as she appeared to wander aimlessly off into and around left field, until she suddenly threw a curveball with so much skill and power it would knock them off their chair."
As a black woman practicing law in the South, she endured gawking and more than a few physical threats. A local paper in Jackson, Miss., derided her as "the Motley woman."
In 1966, President Lyndon B. Johnson appointed her as a judge on the United States District Court for the Southern District of New York at the urging of Senator Robert F. Kennedy of New York, a Democrat, and with the support of Senator Jacob K. Javits, a Republican. The opposition of Southern senators like James O. Eastland, a Mississippi Democrat, was beaten back, and her appointment was confirmed. She became chief judge of the district in 1982 and senior judge in 1986.
Constance Baker was born on Sept. 14, 1921, in New Haven, the ninth of 12 children. Her parents came from the tiny Caribbean island Nevis at the beginning of the 20th century.
Her father worked as a chef for various Yale University student organizations, including Skull and Bones. She attended local schools in what was then an overwhelmingly white community.
One of her first experiences with discrimination came at 15, when she was turned away from a public beach because she was black.
She read books dealing with black history and became president of the local N.A.A.C.P. youth council. She decided that she wanted to be a lawyer, but her family lacked money to send their many children to college. After high school, she struggled to earn a living as a domestic worker.
When she was 18, she made a speech at local African-American social center that was heard by Clarence W. Blakeslee, a white businessman and philanthropist who sponsored the center. He was impressed and offered to finance her education.
She decided to attend Fisk University, a black college in Nashville, partly because she had never been to the South. In Nashville, she encountered a rigidly segregated society, and brought her parents a poignant souvenir: a sign that read "Colored Only."
After a year and a half at Fisk, she transferred to New York University. After graduation in 1943, she entered Columbia Law School, where she began to work as a volunteer at the N.A.A.C.P.'s Legal Defense and Education Fund, an affiliate of the National Organization for the Advancement of Colored People that Mr. Marshall and his mentor, Charles Houston, had created in 1939.
After she graduated in 1946, she began to work full time for the civil rights group at a salary of $50 a week. She worked first on housing cases, fighting to break the restrictive covenants that barred blacks from white neighborhoods.
Also in 1946, she married Joel Wilson Motley Jr., a New York real estate broker. He survives her, as does their son, Joel III, who lives in Scarborough, N.Y.; three grandchildren; her brother Edmund Baker of Florida; and her sisters Edna Carnegie, Eunice Royster and Marian Green, all of New Haven.
Mr. Marshall had no qualms about sending her into the tensest racial terrain, precisely because she was a woman. She said she believed that was why she was assigned to the Meredith case in 1961.
"Thurgood says that the only people who are safe in the South are the women - white and Negro," she said in an interview with Pictorial Living, the magazine of The New York Journal-American, in 1965. "I don't know how he's got that figured. But, so far, I've never been subjected to any violence."
Mr. Meredith's admission to the University of Mississippi in September 1962 was a major victory for the civil rights movement. Mrs. Motley worked on the case for 18 months before Mr. Meredith's name was even seen in the papers.
She made 22 trips to Mississippi as the case dragged on. Judge Motley once called the day Mr. Meredith accepted his diploma in 1963 the most thrilling in her life.
She said her greatest professional satisfaction came with the reinstatement of 1,100 black children in Birmingham who had been expelled for taking part in street demonstrations in the spring of 1963.
In February 1964, Mrs. Motley's high-level civil rights profile drew her into politics. A Democratic State Senate candidate from the Upper West Side was ruled off the ballot because of an election-law technicality. She accepted the nomination on the condition that it would not interfere with her N.A.A.C.P. work and handily defeated a Republican to become the first black woman elected to the State Senate. She was re-elected that November.
She remained in the job until February 1965, when she was chosen by unanimous vote of the City Council to fill a one-year vacancy as Manhattan borough president. In citywide elections nine months later, she was re-elected to a full four-year term with the endorsement of the Democratic, Republican and Liberal Parties.
As borough president, she drew up a seven-point program for the revitalization of Harlem and East Harlem, securing $700,000 to plan for those and other underprivileged areas of the city.
After becoming a federal judge in 1966, Judge Motley ruled in many cases, but her decisions often reflected her past. She decided on behalf of welfare recipients, low-income Medicaid patients and a prisoner who claimed to have been unconstitutionally punished by 372 days of solitary confinement, whom she awarded damages.
She continued to try cases after she took senior status. Her hope as a judge was that she would change the world for the better, she said.
"The work I'm doing now will affect people's lives intimately," she said in an interview with The New York Times in 1977, "it may even change them."
From _The New York Times_, September 29, 2005
Constance Baker Motley, Civil Rights Trailblazer, Dies at 84
By DOUGLAS MARTIN
Constance Baker Motley, a civil rights lawyer who fought nearly every important civil rights case for two decades and then became the first black woman to serve as a federal judge, died yesterday at NYU Downtown Hospital in Manhattan. She was 84.
The cause was congestive heart failure, said Isolde Motley, her daughter-in-law.
Judge Motley was the first black woman to serve in the New York State Senate, as well as the first woman to be Manhattan borough president, a position that guaranteed her a voice in running the entire city under an earlier system of local government called the Board of Estimate.
Judge Motley was at the center of the firestorm that raged through the South in the two decades after World War II, as blacks and their white allies pressed to end the segregation that had gripped the region since Reconstruction. She visited the Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. in jail, sang freedom songs in churches that had been bombed, and spent a night under armed guard with Medgar Evers, the civil rights leader who was later murdered.
But her métier was in the quieter, painstaking preparation and presentation of lawsuits that paved the way to fuller societal participation by blacks. She dressed elegantly, spoke in a low, lilting voice and, in case after case, earned a reputation as the chief courtroom tactician of the civil rights movement.
Gov. George C. Wallace of Alabama and other staunch segregationists yielded, kicking and screaming, to the verdicts of courts ruling against racial segregation. These huge victories were led by the N.A.A.C.P.'s Legal Defense and Education Fund, led by Thurgood Marshall, for which Judge Motley, Jack Greenberg, Robert Carter and a handful of other underpaid, overworked lawyers labored.
In particular, she directed the legal campaign that resulted in the admission of James H. Meredith to the University of Mississippi in 1962. She argued 10 cases before the United States Supreme Court and won nine of them.
Judge Motley won cases that ended segregation in Memphis restaurants and at whites-only lunch counters in Birmingham, Ala. She fought for King's right to march in Albany, Ga. She played an important role in representing blacks seeking admission to the Universities of Florida, Georgia Alabama and Mississippi and Clemson College in South Carolina.
She helped write briefs in the landmark school desegregation case Brown v. Board of Education in 1954 and in later elementary-school integration cases.
Judge Motley was a tall, gracious and stately woman whose oft-stated goal was as simple as it was sometimes elusive: dignity for all people. Her personal approach was also dignified. When a reporter wrote that she had demanded some action by the court, she soon corrected him:
"What do you mean 'I demanded the court'? You don't demand, you pray for relief or move for some action."
Charlayne Hunter-Gault, whose admission to the University of Georgia was engineered by Mrs. Motley's legal finesse, described her courtroom cunning.
"Mrs. Motley's style could be deceptive, often challenging a witness to get away with one lie after another without challenging them," she wrote in her book "In My Place," published in 1992. "It was as if she would lull them into an affirmation of their own arrogance, causing them to relax as she appeared to wander aimlessly off into and around left field, until she suddenly threw a curveball with so much skill and power it would knock them off their chair."
As a black woman practicing law in the South, she endured gawking and more than a few physical threats. A local paper in Jackson, Miss., derided her as "the Motley woman."
In 1966, President Lyndon B. Johnson appointed her as a judge on the United States District Court for the Southern District of New York at the urging of Senator Robert F. Kennedy of New York, a Democrat, and with the support of Senator Jacob K. Javits, a Republican. The opposition of Southern senators like James O. Eastland, a Mississippi Democrat, was beaten back, and her appointment was confirmed. She became chief judge of the district in 1982 and senior judge in 1986.
Constance Baker was born on Sept. 14, 1921, in New Haven, the ninth of 12 children. Her parents came from the tiny Caribbean island Nevis at the beginning of the 20th century.
Her father worked as a chef for various Yale University student organizations, including Skull and Bones. She attended local schools in what was then an overwhelmingly white community.
One of her first experiences with discrimination came at 15, when she was turned away from a public beach because she was black.
She read books dealing with black history and became president of the local N.A.A.C.P. youth council. She decided that she wanted to be a lawyer, but her family lacked money to send their many children to college. After high school, she struggled to earn a living as a domestic worker.
When she was 18, she made a speech at local African-American social center that was heard by Clarence W. Blakeslee, a white businessman and philanthropist who sponsored the center. He was impressed and offered to finance her education.
She decided to attend Fisk University, a black college in Nashville, partly because she had never been to the South. In Nashville, she encountered a rigidly segregated society, and brought her parents a poignant souvenir: a sign that read "Colored Only."
After a year and a half at Fisk, she transferred to New York University. After graduation in 1943, she entered Columbia Law School, where she began to work as a volunteer at the N.A.A.C.P.'s Legal Defense and Education Fund, an affiliate of the National Organization for the Advancement of Colored People that Mr. Marshall and his mentor, Charles Houston, had created in 1939.
After she graduated in 1946, she began to work full time for the civil rights group at a salary of $50 a week. She worked first on housing cases, fighting to break the restrictive covenants that barred blacks from white neighborhoods.
Also in 1946, she married Joel Wilson Motley Jr., a New York real estate broker. He survives her, as does their son, Joel III, who lives in Scarborough, N.Y.; three grandchildren; her brother Edmund Baker of Florida; and her sisters Edna Carnegie, Eunice Royster and Marian Green, all of New Haven.
Mr. Marshall had no qualms about sending her into the tensest racial terrain, precisely because she was a woman. She said she believed that was why she was assigned to the Meredith case in 1961.
"Thurgood says that the only people who are safe in the South are the women - white and Negro," she said in an interview with Pictorial Living, the magazine of The New York Journal-American, in 1965. "I don't know how he's got that figured. But, so far, I've never been subjected to any violence."
Mr. Meredith's admission to the University of Mississippi in September 1962 was a major victory for the civil rights movement. Mrs. Motley worked on the case for 18 months before Mr. Meredith's name was even seen in the papers.
She made 22 trips to Mississippi as the case dragged on. Judge Motley once called the day Mr. Meredith accepted his diploma in 1963 the most thrilling in her life.
She said her greatest professional satisfaction came with the reinstatement of 1,100 black children in Birmingham who had been expelled for taking part in street demonstrations in the spring of 1963.
In February 1964, Mrs. Motley's high-level civil rights profile drew her into politics. A Democratic State Senate candidate from the Upper West Side was ruled off the ballot because of an election-law technicality. She accepted the nomination on the condition that it would not interfere with her N.A.A.C.P. work and handily defeated a Republican to become the first black woman elected to the State Senate. She was re-elected that November.
She remained in the job until February 1965, when she was chosen by unanimous vote of the City Council to fill a one-year vacancy as Manhattan borough president. In citywide elections nine months later, she was re-elected to a full four-year term with the endorsement of the Democratic, Republican and Liberal Parties.
As borough president, she drew up a seven-point program for the revitalization of Harlem and East Harlem, securing $700,000 to plan for those and other underprivileged areas of the city.
After becoming a federal judge in 1966, Judge Motley ruled in many cases, but her decisions often reflected her past. She decided on behalf of welfare recipients, low-income Medicaid patients and a prisoner who claimed to have been unconstitutionally punished by 372 days of solitary confinement, whom she awarded damages.
She continued to try cases after she took senior status. Her hope as a judge was that she would change the world for the better, she said.
"The work I'm doing now will affect people's lives intimately," she said in an interview with The New York Times in 1977, "it may even change them."
I Wrote That?
For some reason, not completely clear even to me, my mood has been declining rapidly over the past few days. But tonight, I had a good pick-me-up. I have been working away on my teaching portfolio, my website, and my dissertation abstract. [I've also been working on those durn cover letters again--I know I know--I'm supposed to be done with them, but a friend found a typo and now I'm paranoid.] But back to the point, in working on my dissertation abstract, I decided to take a look at Chapter One. A look became a reading, and after I read the whole thing I could only say one thing--
Man, did I write that?
It wasn't just that I hadn't looked at the document in a while. I just plan impressed myself. My writing has truly come a long way and if I do say so myself, Chapter One definitely has the makings for a good book. If I read that chapter, even with its academic nods, in a book, I would be compelled to read more. That made me feel good tonight. So I'm going to keep working a little while longer--took a long nap today so I'm not in the immediate need of sleep. Hopefully I can keep up some positive momentum for tomorrow.
Man, did I write that?
It wasn't just that I hadn't looked at the document in a while. I just plan impressed myself. My writing has truly come a long way and if I do say so myself, Chapter One definitely has the makings for a good book. If I read that chapter, even with its academic nods, in a book, I would be compelled to read more. That made me feel good tonight. So I'm going to keep working a little while longer--took a long nap today so I'm not in the immediate need of sleep. Hopefully I can keep up some positive momentum for tomorrow.
As of Yet...
...Still ain't done what I'm tryin to do...--Kindred the Family Soul (don't sleep on the new album, In This Life Together, it's permanently lodged in my CD drive--and no I don't have a DVD drive yet.)
Cover letters for the first two applications are DONE. Need to polish up that durn teaching portfolio STILL. I must: 1) proof the philosophy 2) print up some cute section dividers 3) make a table of contents 4) figure out how I want to bind this thing 5) take it to a copy shop..... And it all needs to be done by Monday!!
As of yet, Third Chapter is still on my desk. Man I wanted to be done with it today. Still some hours left.
I'm going to table sending off that second manuscript until after I get these applications in the mail. I definitely want to get it out before Major Conference in November.
Still ain't done what I'm tryin to do.
It's going to be not-fun weekend. But hopefully productive.
Cover letters for the first two applications are DONE. Need to polish up that durn teaching portfolio STILL. I must: 1) proof the philosophy 2) print up some cute section dividers 3) make a table of contents 4) figure out how I want to bind this thing 5) take it to a copy shop..... And it all needs to be done by Monday!!
As of yet, Third Chapter is still on my desk. Man I wanted to be done with it today. Still some hours left.
I'm going to table sending off that second manuscript until after I get these applications in the mail. I definitely want to get it out before Major Conference in November.
Still ain't done what I'm tryin to do.
It's going to be not-fun weekend. But hopefully productive.
End of the Month Reflections
Man, September turned out to be such a different month for me than July and August. I'm tempted to, but I'm not going to say less productive, because I had different needs this month. I needed to rest and I did--physically and mentally. I needed to get out of the house and have some fun--and I did. I needed to get ready for job season and I did; I got organized and the ball is rolling.
But gracious, there is so much more still to do. My to-do lists on my blog, in my Outlook, on my desks are calling me. Quite a few items still need to be checked off!! But still, I need to not diminish my accomplishments--I did get some good work this month. Going into this final weekend, I will do some serious work finishing Third Chapter and getting these first two applications out the door.
October is definitely going to be a "back on the grind" month. A good thing. Main goal--to be finishing up Fifth Chapter by the time I go to the National Conference in November. But before I get ahead of myself, Third Chapter calls....
But gracious, there is so much more still to do. My to-do lists on my blog, in my Outlook, on my desks are calling me. Quite a few items still need to be checked off!! But still, I need to not diminish my accomplishments--I did get some good work this month. Going into this final weekend, I will do some serious work finishing Third Chapter and getting these first two applications out the door.
October is definitely going to be a "back on the grind" month. A good thing. Main goal--to be finishing up Fifth Chapter by the time I go to the National Conference in November. But before I get ahead of myself, Third Chapter calls....
15 Day Hold
I have to give myself incentives to work. Positive reinforcement goes a long way with me. As does guilt. My next big weekend of fun is 15 days away, so I'm plugging away at getting my work done in the meantime. I finished all of my logistical work for my applications: transcripts requested, credential file is set up, funding applications completed for the National Conference, letters of recommendation sorted out and updated--good productive days work on that front. I still need to polish up my teaching portfolio, and I'm waiting for more feedback on Cover Letter #2. I'm on track to get my first two packages sent out this week.
Now the dissertation--The ol' diss and I need to spend some serious time together over the course of the next 15 days. Three more good days on Third Chapter and I'm sending it off. Although this work of writing without a net is becoming increasingly nerve-racking, I'm going to just keep doing what I do and keep cranking chapter drafts out--revising is a lot easier than working from scratch--I think. As my undergraduate advisor told me this evening, "Trust your own insights, your own feedback. Just know that you know what you need to write, and just write." I need to get back to doing a little more of that in the next few days. So job stuff is taking a backseat until at least Saturday so I can just write.
Now the dissertation--The ol' diss and I need to spend some serious time together over the course of the next 15 days. Three more good days on Third Chapter and I'm sending it off. Although this work of writing without a net is becoming increasingly nerve-racking, I'm going to just keep doing what I do and keep cranking chapter drafts out--revising is a lot easier than working from scratch--I think. As my undergraduate advisor told me this evening, "Trust your own insights, your own feedback. Just know that you know what you need to write, and just write." I need to get back to doing a little more of that in the next few days. So job stuff is taking a backseat until at least Saturday so I can just write.
The Increasing Mess That is My Job Search
My first annual academic job search is going full steam ahead. Unlike a couple months ago, I think I'm finally committed to seeing this thing through. The score to date:
Tenure Track Positions: 7
PostDoc Positions: 8
Relatively small count compared to the 50 and 60 applications I hear folks in English send out around MLA. But it's more than enough for me. I realize my odds of landing a job decrease with the smaller selection pool, but I just can't bring myself applying to places just based on name recognition or prestige in the field. I've kicked a few out of my original pool and decided on positions where I could actually see myself. It's a motley crew of interdisciplinary postdocs and jobs--with a few in my field at liberal arts and research intensive institutions. For the first time in this search, I'm pleased with my selection, but I'm ALL over the place. There's no clear sense of what I really want to come out of this mess. But that's okay for now. Got that second cover letter drafted and sent out for feedback tonight. Now I can sleep.
Tenure Track Positions: 7
PostDoc Positions: 8
Relatively small count compared to the 50 and 60 applications I hear folks in English send out around MLA. But it's more than enough for me. I realize my odds of landing a job decrease with the smaller selection pool, but I just can't bring myself applying to places just based on name recognition or prestige in the field. I've kicked a few out of my original pool and decided on positions where I could actually see myself. It's a motley crew of interdisciplinary postdocs and jobs--with a few in my field at liberal arts and research intensive institutions. For the first time in this search, I'm pleased with my selection, but I'm ALL over the place. There's no clear sense of what I really want to come out of this mess. But that's okay for now. Got that second cover letter drafted and sent out for feedback tonight. Now I can sleep.
How Do You Know What You Know?
First, and most importantly, I haven't really done any writing on my dissertation this week. That sucks. Maybe tonight. I think in the back of my head I know I still have enough time to get this draft out by the end of the week so I'm not feeling pressed. Unfortunately, I need a little personal deadline pressure right now to get me going.
But my first two job application deadlines are approaching and I don't need the pressure. I'm definitely starting to feel rushed to put stuff together. I've been working steadily on my materials but I'm feeling a little frazzled. I think it's because this is my FIRST set of applications I'm sending out. My internal perfectionism is in overdrive right now. My first application to go in is to one of my top choices so that is keeping the stress level a little higher than normal. And because it's my among my top choices, I don't want to wait till the last minute to send this stuff off. I really want to have everything in the mail EARLY next week. Once I get these applications in the mail, I'll feel like I can breathe again--at least until my November deadlines start approaching!
So I'm polishing up my first two cover letters to go out. The one in my major field is pretty much set to go--feelin good about it. The second one makes me ask--how do I know what I know?? The institution has specifically asked that letters show one's interdisciplinary knowledge. Well how do you show knowledge in a letter? I'm not happy with what I have so far--I don't think it is doing what it's supposed to do--so I need to finish up this draft TONIGHT and send it out for feedback...
But my first two job application deadlines are approaching and I don't need the pressure. I'm definitely starting to feel rushed to put stuff together. I've been working steadily on my materials but I'm feeling a little frazzled. I think it's because this is my FIRST set of applications I'm sending out. My internal perfectionism is in overdrive right now. My first application to go in is to one of my top choices so that is keeping the stress level a little higher than normal. And because it's my among my top choices, I don't want to wait till the last minute to send this stuff off. I really want to have everything in the mail EARLY next week. Once I get these applications in the mail, I'll feel like I can breathe again--at least until my November deadlines start approaching!
So I'm polishing up my first two cover letters to go out. The one in my major field is pretty much set to go--feelin good about it. The second one makes me ask--how do I know what I know?? The institution has specifically asked that letters show one's interdisciplinary knowledge. Well how do you show knowledge in a letter? I'm not happy with what I have so far--I don't think it is doing what it's supposed to do--so I need to finish up this draft TONIGHT and send it out for feedback...
Back in Business
Today I'm recovering from a wonderful weekend of being a sister and princess. I had a fabulous time away from home and my trip turned out to be a great mini-vacation. I'm a little sad today that it's over, but I have a lot of business to get on this week.
Job market:
Job market:
- Before I left I found a couple more positions I want to apply for so I need to get out some more request for letters.
- One of my letter writers wants to discuss some things with me--need to call her TODAY.
- Need to apply for additional funding to go to the national conference.
- Need to finish my teaching portfolio and finalize the first cover letter that is going out.
- Must get going on drafting new cover letters for the other positions due in November.
- I really want to order some business cards--need to call my institution and do that this week as well.
- Must set a date to go visit the Advisors!!
- Write every day!
- Finish adding new material to Third Chapter this week.
- Get out second article for review.
- Exercise--really want to start an exercise routine this week!!
- Eat right. (and maybe take some vitamins)
- Sleep regularly.
Diggin In--3 Hard Pages
Not feeling ultra-hot tonight so today's pages were hard but they are done. Looking back over the progress of the past few days, I'm pleasantly pleased, but I have some more biography work to do. I may try to write a little more in the morning or tomorrow night before I leave town. I'm feelin good about this work--lookin forward to finishing up next week!
How to Write: Teaching Philosophy Statement
Since I complained about cover letters yesterday, I thought I'd be more positive about another piece of the application process--the teaching philosophy statement. Sadly, a lot of ads I see don't explicitly ask for one--I appreciate the universities that say they definitely want a statement of your philosophy for the classroom as opposed to the more generic "evidence of teaching effectiveness." The assistant professor positions I'm interested in are primarily because of the classroom opportunities, so I feel more comfortable knowing that the search committee is actually interested in what I'm bringing to the classroom (you know, those little rooms that keep universities from being a completely corporate building with a football stadium). Disgressing again. So far, I'm happy with the draft of my statement that I came up with. It still needs work, but it is organized creatively and captures the best parts of my teaching personality. I have a few samples that I received from my university's teaching excellence center that were EXTREMELY helpful. There are lots of nice links on the web too:
- Good advice from the Chronicle
- A more philosophical approach: Iowa State CELT
- Practical tips for brainstorming from University of Hawaii (Great website on portfolio preparation)
- Helpful ideas from Washington University
Feelin Good About Just Writing
Today was one of those moments when I realized I missed writing. I wrote in my journal twice today--I rarely journal every day and I have been for the past few days. But even more rare was that I wrote in my journal twice in one day. AND I'm blogging--what in the world. I must have really been missing writing--wow. This job stuff is important and is very writing intensive, but it is clearly not the type of writing that my brain wants to do right now.
***Digression***I don't LIKE the genre of the cover letter or the circumstances that necessitate one. Not saying that I don't believe I am writing good letters--I've gotten some good feedback on my drafts so far, but I like nothing at all about the act of writing them. I don't like trying to compact in a little space all of my big personality, my own rhetorical style, and oh yeah, all the reasons why I'm perfect for a job where I don't even know exactly what they are looking for. ***Further Digression***There must be a way we can simplify this whole academic job ad search thing by the way. I understand that academics chose to operate in their own language--rhetoric by definition keeps people in and keep people out. (Good Chronicle piece on rhetoric in department meetings that caught my attention today). But is it really THAT difficult to say what you are really looking for in a job ad--some of these things are too annoyingly vague--and what's annoying is knowing that the people on the search committee know one of two things 1) exactly the kind of scholar they want 2) exactly the kind of candidate they DON'T want to waste their time on reading an application from. So cover letter writing therefore becomes unnecessarily frustrating for someone like me who actually cares about words.
Nonetheless, my love for writing was renewed today--just in time. Today, I was working on my biography of the subject of my Third Chapter. I thought writing about another living subject, especially one still active in politics might be a little frustrating, but the past two days of writing have been good. I've easily met my three page goal and the writing is solid. The beautiful thing about writing biographies is that you are telling a story. I took a qualitative research class that talked about biography as a form of research and the class took some of the fun out of the form for me. I mean it is important to think about biography as research because biographers, like historians, are not simply relaying facts. When we engage in this type of writing, even if it seems apolitical or neutral, we are arguing that an individual should be viewed in a certain light and understood in light of a certain set of contextual circumstances. In biography/history we are constantly making choices about what information to put in and leave out--thereby constructing one story, not THE story. Enough academic-speak. I'm enjoying writing this piece. Her life is interesting and she has excellent press coverage so I don't have to pull for information. I've been having fun finding colorful quotes from her and I'm learning so much about how she got to where she is today. I think I enjoy academic writing most when I'm learning in the process as well.
But today, it's not just the dissertation writing, I'm just feeling good about writing in general. And that's a wonderful change and a wonderful way to get back into the groove of the dissertation.
***Digression***I don't LIKE the genre of the cover letter or the circumstances that necessitate one. Not saying that I don't believe I am writing good letters--I've gotten some good feedback on my drafts so far, but I like nothing at all about the act of writing them. I don't like trying to compact in a little space all of my big personality, my own rhetorical style, and oh yeah, all the reasons why I'm perfect for a job where I don't even know exactly what they are looking for. ***Further Digression***There must be a way we can simplify this whole academic job ad search thing by the way. I understand that academics chose to operate in their own language--rhetoric by definition keeps people in and keep people out. (Good Chronicle piece on rhetoric in department meetings that caught my attention today). But is it really THAT difficult to say what you are really looking for in a job ad--some of these things are too annoyingly vague--and what's annoying is knowing that the people on the search committee know one of two things 1) exactly the kind of scholar they want 2) exactly the kind of candidate they DON'T want to waste their time on reading an application from. So cover letter writing therefore becomes unnecessarily frustrating for someone like me who actually cares about words.
Nonetheless, my love for writing was renewed today--just in time. Today, I was working on my biography of the subject of my Third Chapter. I thought writing about another living subject, especially one still active in politics might be a little frustrating, but the past two days of writing have been good. I've easily met my three page goal and the writing is solid. The beautiful thing about writing biographies is that you are telling a story. I took a qualitative research class that talked about biography as a form of research and the class took some of the fun out of the form for me. I mean it is important to think about biography as research because biographers, like historians, are not simply relaying facts. When we engage in this type of writing, even if it seems apolitical or neutral, we are arguing that an individual should be viewed in a certain light and understood in light of a certain set of contextual circumstances. In biography/history we are constantly making choices about what information to put in and leave out--thereby constructing one story, not THE story. Enough academic-speak. I'm enjoying writing this piece. Her life is interesting and she has excellent press coverage so I don't have to pull for information. I've been having fun finding colorful quotes from her and I'm learning so much about how she got to where she is today. I think I enjoy academic writing most when I'm learning in the process as well.
But today, it's not just the dissertation writing, I'm just feeling good about writing in general. And that's a wonderful change and a wonderful way to get back into the groove of the dissertation.
Three Page Goal
I really don't believe I need a lot of new pages for this draft. I still need to do some more reorganizing and tweaking of the language/arguments. But so far I like what I'm working with. Third Chapter is still on pace to be out the door this month!!! My goal for Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday is simple--write three new pages a day. The rest of my time this week will be spent finishing up some job search details and getting ready for my first Southeast sorority conference this weekend!!
Slow Progress
Gettin back in the groove of dissertation writing is going slow. But I'm not going to beat myself up too much--it's the first official day back on the job. Tryin to refamiliarize myself with Third Chapter. But a trip to the library is definitely in order so I can beef up this biographical information. I'm thinking I will spend this week rewriting the biography section and next week beefing up the analysis. I put in 10-14 good days of work, that should really be all this draft needs and Third Chapter will be off to the advisors. So today and tomorrow will be about getting a plan together and the ever exciting work of switching styles from MLA to Chicago.
In the meantime, I'm excited about how my second syllabus is turning out. I just need to come up with good assignments for the course and I'm all set.
In the meantime, I'm excited about how my second syllabus is turning out. I just need to come up with good assignments for the course and I'm all set.
Teaching Portfolio--Weekend Plans
Slowly but surely, the pieces of this teaching portfolio puzzle are coming together. One sample syllabus is done (introductory course). And tonight I finished the summary of courses I can teach in my various areas of expertise. I need to polish up my syllabus for the advanced/specialized course (about 75% done), and recreate the third one for undergraduate majors. I want to make it more of a survey course--I'm not sure why I'm getting so involved with this process of making syllabi, but I want to be happy with what I'm putting together. So I originally had the third syllabus organized around a couple of texts that I would like to teach, but I'm changing it to important themes in my major research area. That way I can survey important literatures and leave room for primary texts and media clippings as well (it makes sense in my head).
Friday's Goal is to finish fiddlin' with this portfolio stuff and put it away for a few days. Miss Daisy has a half-day tomorrow so I don't have to pick her up--that will give me some more time to write in the afternoon.
Saturday's Goal is getting back on Third Chapter. I am really hoping I can pull together this draft of Third Chapter in a couple weeks. The working paper that I have so far is very strong and just needs to be expanded, mostly in terms of biographical information and scholarly literature. I think the analysis of the rhetorical text is already pretty solid. And I have some good feedback from my Outside Member that will really get me going. Now if I can just figure out how to properly cite government records (since her pink pen indicates that I do not know how), I'll be well on my way!
Sunday's Goal--Enjoying family and sorority time. I love Sundays because we always do the big Southern extended family Sunday dinner thing. But I'm especially excited about this Sunday. I'm going to my first sorority meeting down here. It's going to be good, but bittersweet. This will be my first meeting in this region and things in our sorority tend to vary from region to region. But again, I'm looking forward to it--I'm missing the activity of sorority life very much right now.
Friday's Goal is to finish fiddlin' with this portfolio stuff and put it away for a few days. Miss Daisy has a half-day tomorrow so I don't have to pick her up--that will give me some more time to write in the afternoon.
Saturday's Goal is getting back on Third Chapter. I am really hoping I can pull together this draft of Third Chapter in a couple weeks. The working paper that I have so far is very strong and just needs to be expanded, mostly in terms of biographical information and scholarly literature. I think the analysis of the rhetorical text is already pretty solid. And I have some good feedback from my Outside Member that will really get me going. Now if I can just figure out how to properly cite government records (since her pink pen indicates that I do not know how), I'll be well on my way!
Sunday's Goal--Enjoying family and sorority time. I love Sundays because we always do the big Southern extended family Sunday dinner thing. But I'm especially excited about this Sunday. I'm going to my first sorority meeting down here. It's going to be good, but bittersweet. This will be my first meeting in this region and things in our sorority tend to vary from region to region. But again, I'm looking forward to it--I'm missing the activity of sorority life very much right now.
Teaching Portfolio: Sample Syllabi??
Ok, so how many sample syllabi should I include in my teaching portfolio? I've only taught two courses, both general eds, both I've taught a few million times. But I'm not applying for jobs to teach those courses. All the positions I'm applying for are more directly related to my own research so I want to include some "dream" syllabi that I've created and hope to use in the future. The question is, how many??? I'm thinking three:
- One course based on my research (highly specialized, upperdivision)
- One course that is a more general/theoretical look at the field and the literature in the field (good course for a major in the field who has at least had one or two intro courses)
- One general introduction course on rhetoric
A Divo...
...is a male diva.
The rhetorician in me loves a new word--even a silly one.
Thanks Frankie.
The rhetorician in me loves a new word--even a silly one.
Thanks Frankie.
Queen of To-Do Lists
It was inevitable that I would have a list on my blog because I make lists all the time. I've calmed down a bit on my Post-It habit although every now and then I find myself feenin' for a fluorescent pink sticky note. But seriously, if I don't write it down, chances are, it won't get done. (I know, I know some Greek guy predicted long ago that writing would be the end of memory--I'm not in the mood to flex my ancient rhetorics muscles tonight). A trip to Walmart without a list generally means coming home without something I needed and with a bunch of stuff I definitely didn't really need. Today was no exception. I went to Walmart without a list--forgot some mailing labels I needed. But I made a few lists for the job search. I spent a lot of time today organizing materials for the search, and worked on all of my cover letters for the assistant professor positions (6 total). [I think I'm going to put off starting in on the postdoc letters next month.] I typed up checklists for each of my application files--that made me feel ultra-organized and all warm and fuzzy inside.
My teaching evals are all together now and I realized that I'm missing my two most recent semesters. My department's very sweet adminstrative assistant is trying to track those down for me. I've decided I am going to work on creating a graph of my quantitative evaluation scores. On the two measures that my department takes most seriously--course quality and instructor quality--over the past four years, my scores have consistently climbed. So rather than having the search committees wade through 20+ measures by which we are rated (multiplied by the 10+ times I've taught the class), I'm thinking that it might be helpful if they can just quickly "see" how my performance as an instructor has improved the longer I've been in school. My very first semester teaching evaluation scores were weird--in one section the marks were quite abysmal while in the other, they were rather high. Since then, they've been consistently going up, so I'm trying to revive some old computer skills to make a graph to reflect that. I honestly can't remember the last time I made a graph. Probably not since my TI-85 crashed.
While I often rail at the fact that I was a graduate student in one of the heaviest graduate student teaching loads in the university, I am grateful to have had so much trial and error experience. I'm grateful to have never been a real TA--I've never worked under another professor and with the exception of some general department requirements for our gen. ed. course, I've had pretty much complete autonomy over all of my sections. So I'm grateful for my level of comfort in the classroom, whether there are 10 students, 30 students, or 150 students. I'm looking forward to working up these sample syllabi--I have a lot of ideas for possible courses--and although I know some things probably work better in my head than on paper, I'm actually getting a little excited about the idea of teaching again. A little.
And of course, the big thing still on the lots to-do list is the teaching philosophy statement. I'm tired of talking about it, I need to be about it. But. It continues to allude me. I'm trying to do some freewriting tonight to get it out of my system. We'll see how that goes....
My teaching evals are all together now and I realized that I'm missing my two most recent semesters. My department's very sweet adminstrative assistant is trying to track those down for me. I've decided I am going to work on creating a graph of my quantitative evaluation scores. On the two measures that my department takes most seriously--course quality and instructor quality--over the past four years, my scores have consistently climbed. So rather than having the search committees wade through 20+ measures by which we are rated (multiplied by the 10+ times I've taught the class), I'm thinking that it might be helpful if they can just quickly "see" how my performance as an instructor has improved the longer I've been in school. My very first semester teaching evaluation scores were weird--in one section the marks were quite abysmal while in the other, they were rather high. Since then, they've been consistently going up, so I'm trying to revive some old computer skills to make a graph to reflect that. I honestly can't remember the last time I made a graph. Probably not since my TI-85 crashed.
While I often rail at the fact that I was a graduate student in one of the heaviest graduate student teaching loads in the university, I am grateful to have had so much trial and error experience. I'm grateful to have never been a real TA--I've never worked under another professor and with the exception of some general department requirements for our gen. ed. course, I've had pretty much complete autonomy over all of my sections. So I'm grateful for my level of comfort in the classroom, whether there are 10 students, 30 students, or 150 students. I'm looking forward to working up these sample syllabi--I have a lot of ideas for possible courses--and although I know some things probably work better in my head than on paper, I'm actually getting a little excited about the idea of teaching again. A little.
And of course, the big thing still on the lots to-do list is the teaching philosophy statement. I'm tired of talking about it, I need to be about it. But. It continues to allude me. I'm trying to do some freewriting tonight to get it out of my system. We'll see how that goes....
Getting Organized
There is no fun way to solicit letters of recommendation--and I'm realizing that even for the few positions I have decided to apply for, I need a lot of them. I got through organizing and sending out information to four of my referees. I have four more to go--I'll finish that in the AM.
Still a little more to go on the teaching philosophy statement before I can send it out for feedback. I need to get moving on my sample syllabi as well. Fortunately, I have one draft from my comps, and a few drafts from days when I was procrastinating during seminar papers. I finally started to create some post-vacation momentum but it is going to be a busy week....
Still a little more to go on the teaching philosophy statement before I can send it out for feedback. I need to get moving on my sample syllabi as well. Fortunately, I have one draft from my comps, and a few drafts from days when I was procrastinating during seminar papers. I finally started to create some post-vacation momentum but it is going to be a busy week....
Becoming a Professor...
Today, I'm devoting energy to getting my package together for my job applications. Academic coach has begun a conversation about the transition from being a graduate student to becoming a professor that is very timely for me. She has generously quoted on her site several of the obstacles for a new faculty member of color, many of which I have been thinking about. Here's my current response to her points, and a few additional questions (italicized text indicate points raised by Academic Coach):
*It is difficult to find mentors. There are few minority faculty at a senior level available to provide guidance and support.
This has been my experience in ALL of my educational experiences. Since 1st grade, I've only had four teachers/professors that looked like me--1st grade, 6th grade math, senior year of college (literature), and graduate school. And unfortunately, statistically speaking, that is probably higher than the experiences of most women of color. I specifically chose a graduate program where I would be able to work with other women of color, and I imagine that as a new faculty member I will find students doing the same thing. I think what I have learned from watching senior faculty members of color is that they tend to do a better job than most academics of forging networks outside of their department because they have needs that are not just based in academics or research. I've seen a number of mentoring relationships between senior and new faculty members of color across disciplines, and that is encouraging. As I am preparing for this transition, I am looking at assistant professor/post-doc positions at institutions with African American faculty (and preferably more than a handful). Having been the "only one" for most of my life, I know that for me it is important to be in an environment where I can learn from and socialize with men and women of similar backgrounds and experiences. Quality of life is highly important for me in this job search--location and diversity are two of my top five "must have" issues.
* Minorities, especially women of color, are asked to be on more committees and panels than white, male colleagues. It is almost automatically assumed that they will serve when issues of race and ethnicity are related to the committee topic. These additional service requirements cut into time for research.
This concerns me and I'm not sure how one can address this one. Life in academe has already demonstrated for me how this works, both through observation and experience. Is this an issue that can be addressed during the job negotiation process? Is it wrong to just say no? How can one tactfully ask why they are being chosen continually for this type of service? Are there ways to reduce teaching or research obligations if you are continually asked to "serve?"
*Students of color understandably seek out minority faculty members as mentors and role models. Thus professors end up burdened by heavy advising responsibilities. The faculty of color I work with face a difficult internal conflict: they are committed to providing the mentoring they'’ve lacked, yet know that their own careers will be hurt if they spend too much time helping students.
I decided to be a professor partly because I almost went through four years of college without having one Black professor. It wasn't until my very last semester that I was blessed to have a Black woman professor--a national award winning English scholar. And what drove me nuts was that despite all of her honors, I had never really heard about her. She was a great inspiration and was one of the many reasons I decided to stay in academia. Growing up as a Black woman in the South, teaching has always been an honorable profession in my community. When I tell people, especially my elders, that I'm going to teach they say "oh that's so good baby--we need more teachers." Around my way, "teachers" generally refers to those in K-12. Growing up I never felt an urgency to be a professor; I always thought I'd have a career, and then one day come back home to be a "teacher." But I realized that we also need more professors, and I feel very strongly committed to working with students of color to inspire them in whatever they do, but especially to stay in higher education. For the time being, I don't have any conflicts about that--working with students is the most rewarding thing about this work. But I know that the type of institution I end up in will greatly influence the struggle between advising--teaching--research priorities.
*White colleagues sometimes have the attitude that faculty of color "have it easier"”, are under-qualified, or less intellectually talented. People make it clear that they believe the minority faculty member has gotten the job because of their race or ethnicity.
Story of my life. I used to get upset and wonder why my high class rankings, GPAs, or SATs didn't matter--really bothered me as a kid. Especially when despite all I'd accomplished, I'd still have teachers trying to keep me out of upper-level classes (fortunately I had a diligent mother who was NOT having that). I've gotten over this whole thing and I know that higher ed is full of old school affirmative action playa hatas. If I don't get invited out to lunch because of some perception that I'm an unqualified affirmative action hire, the sun will still shine and the moon will still glow. In reality, being a person of color, especially one studying minority issues, means being "doubly-qualified." As a graduate student, I have to be on top of everything that my peers know as well as recovering my own history and creating new research in an area most of my discipline hasn't touched. Quite simply, that work is hard. For my comps, I was responsible for the standard literatures of the field as well as all I had learned about race and gender issues. And it was sad to go back through past answers to see how infrequently questions off of the center are asked. This is actually one of the things about the transition from grad student to faculty member that I'm looking forward to. I can immerse myself more in my own research area and not feel as obligated to know EVERYTHING.
*If the minority faculty member conducts research related to minority issues it is frequently seen as less important or legitimate than mainstream” scholarly interests.
Yeah. This one I only began to experience in my last few years of education. As a young student, I studied what everyone else studied. I always did something special for Black history month in school, but who didn't. I read a lot growing up and was immersed in Black literature at an early age, but that was at home. I actually remember the first time I really researched something "Black"--I did a paper on the Harlem Renaissance in a high school and everyone thought it was so "interesting." I didn't mind that word at the time, but the more and more I've come into my own area of research in Black women's history and rhetoric, I've come to clench my teeth at the word interesting. It's an easy academic way to provide positive feedback, but to keep from being critical or engaged in anything that is "other." It is a constant struggle to show why this work is important and a legitimate area of research. And unfortunately those of us starting out still have to be Phillis Wheatleys and get our work endorsed by "mainstream" journals and university presses. I do my work to show how my research adds to and contributes to the discipline, but I know I will continually be frustrated with this process as the margins always have to work towards the center, but those at the center never have an obligation to meet the folks at the margins if they don't want to.
*Being a "token member" of a department is isolating and the lack of social support provides ongoing emotional and social stress. All minorities in our society face daily reminders that they are seen in stereotyped, negative ways.
Tell me about it. Unfortunately, higher ed and research-oriented careers foster isolation. And unfortunately, too many scholars of color buy into this. When ones' life revolves around your department and your research, it is easy to get caught up in the stress of being a "token." Frankly, being the "token" sucks, and if that's all you are, that really sucks. The key is creating community wherever you are. For me, one of the first means of doing so is family and the second is friends and sorority. I continue to keep such strong ties with my sorority because it is an instant means of connecting myself and rejuvenating my spirit in a nation wide network of women of color. My life has never been just school--when it has come close to that, those have been my darkest days. The key is to keep yourself emerged in the things and the people that make you who you are--and I think that should go for anyone in academe regardless of race or gender.
*It is difficult to find mentors. There are few minority faculty at a senior level available to provide guidance and support.
This has been my experience in ALL of my educational experiences. Since 1st grade, I've only had four teachers/professors that looked like me--1st grade, 6th grade math, senior year of college (literature), and graduate school. And unfortunately, statistically speaking, that is probably higher than the experiences of most women of color. I specifically chose a graduate program where I would be able to work with other women of color, and I imagine that as a new faculty member I will find students doing the same thing. I think what I have learned from watching senior faculty members of color is that they tend to do a better job than most academics of forging networks outside of their department because they have needs that are not just based in academics or research. I've seen a number of mentoring relationships between senior and new faculty members of color across disciplines, and that is encouraging. As I am preparing for this transition, I am looking at assistant professor/post-doc positions at institutions with African American faculty (and preferably more than a handful). Having been the "only one" for most of my life, I know that for me it is important to be in an environment where I can learn from and socialize with men and women of similar backgrounds and experiences. Quality of life is highly important for me in this job search--location and diversity are two of my top five "must have" issues.
* Minorities, especially women of color, are asked to be on more committees and panels than white, male colleagues. It is almost automatically assumed that they will serve when issues of race and ethnicity are related to the committee topic. These additional service requirements cut into time for research.
This concerns me and I'm not sure how one can address this one. Life in academe has already demonstrated for me how this works, both through observation and experience. Is this an issue that can be addressed during the job negotiation process? Is it wrong to just say no? How can one tactfully ask why they are being chosen continually for this type of service? Are there ways to reduce teaching or research obligations if you are continually asked to "serve?"
*Students of color understandably seek out minority faculty members as mentors and role models. Thus professors end up burdened by heavy advising responsibilities. The faculty of color I work with face a difficult internal conflict: they are committed to providing the mentoring they'’ve lacked, yet know that their own careers will be hurt if they spend too much time helping students.
I decided to be a professor partly because I almost went through four years of college without having one Black professor. It wasn't until my very last semester that I was blessed to have a Black woman professor--a national award winning English scholar. And what drove me nuts was that despite all of her honors, I had never really heard about her. She was a great inspiration and was one of the many reasons I decided to stay in academia. Growing up as a Black woman in the South, teaching has always been an honorable profession in my community. When I tell people, especially my elders, that I'm going to teach they say "oh that's so good baby--we need more teachers." Around my way, "teachers" generally refers to those in K-12. Growing up I never felt an urgency to be a professor; I always thought I'd have a career, and then one day come back home to be a "teacher." But I realized that we also need more professors, and I feel very strongly committed to working with students of color to inspire them in whatever they do, but especially to stay in higher education. For the time being, I don't have any conflicts about that--working with students is the most rewarding thing about this work. But I know that the type of institution I end up in will greatly influence the struggle between advising--teaching--research priorities.
*White colleagues sometimes have the attitude that faculty of color "have it easier"”, are under-qualified, or less intellectually talented. People make it clear that they believe the minority faculty member has gotten the job because of their race or ethnicity.
Story of my life. I used to get upset and wonder why my high class rankings, GPAs, or SATs didn't matter--really bothered me as a kid. Especially when despite all I'd accomplished, I'd still have teachers trying to keep me out of upper-level classes (fortunately I had a diligent mother who was NOT having that). I've gotten over this whole thing and I know that higher ed is full of old school affirmative action playa hatas. If I don't get invited out to lunch because of some perception that I'm an unqualified affirmative action hire, the sun will still shine and the moon will still glow. In reality, being a person of color, especially one studying minority issues, means being "doubly-qualified." As a graduate student, I have to be on top of everything that my peers know as well as recovering my own history and creating new research in an area most of my discipline hasn't touched. Quite simply, that work is hard. For my comps, I was responsible for the standard literatures of the field as well as all I had learned about race and gender issues. And it was sad to go back through past answers to see how infrequently questions off of the center are asked. This is actually one of the things about the transition from grad student to faculty member that I'm looking forward to. I can immerse myself more in my own research area and not feel as obligated to know EVERYTHING.
*If the minority faculty member conducts research related to minority issues it is frequently seen as less important or legitimate than mainstream” scholarly interests.
Yeah. This one I only began to experience in my last few years of education. As a young student, I studied what everyone else studied. I always did something special for Black history month in school, but who didn't. I read a lot growing up and was immersed in Black literature at an early age, but that was at home. I actually remember the first time I really researched something "Black"--I did a paper on the Harlem Renaissance in a high school and everyone thought it was so "interesting." I didn't mind that word at the time, but the more and more I've come into my own area of research in Black women's history and rhetoric, I've come to clench my teeth at the word interesting. It's an easy academic way to provide positive feedback, but to keep from being critical or engaged in anything that is "other." It is a constant struggle to show why this work is important and a legitimate area of research. And unfortunately those of us starting out still have to be Phillis Wheatleys and get our work endorsed by "mainstream" journals and university presses. I do my work to show how my research adds to and contributes to the discipline, but I know I will continually be frustrated with this process as the margins always have to work towards the center, but those at the center never have an obligation to meet the folks at the margins if they don't want to.
*Being a "token member" of a department is isolating and the lack of social support provides ongoing emotional and social stress. All minorities in our society face daily reminders that they are seen in stereotyped, negative ways.
Tell me about it. Unfortunately, higher ed and research-oriented careers foster isolation. And unfortunately, too many scholars of color buy into this. When ones' life revolves around your department and your research, it is easy to get caught up in the stress of being a "token." Frankly, being the "token" sucks, and if that's all you are, that really sucks. The key is creating community wherever you are. For me, one of the first means of doing so is family and the second is friends and sorority. I continue to keep such strong ties with my sorority because it is an instant means of connecting myself and rejuvenating my spirit in a nation wide network of women of color. My life has never been just school--when it has come close to that, those have been my darkest days. The key is to keep yourself emerged in the things and the people that make you who you are--and I think that should go for anyone in academe regardless of race or gender.
Back to Life, Back to Reality
Back to the here and now. Past few days have just been fabulous. Just absolutely wonderful. This was a much needed weekend away from the computer. But now it is back to work.
I'll be chipping away at the to-do list this week. I really need to put some dents into this teaching portfolio and I also need to add copies of my transcripts to the list of things I need as well. It's going to be a busy week, but I feel wonderfully rested and rejuvenated!
I'll be chipping away at the to-do list this week. I really need to put some dents into this teaching portfolio and I also need to add copies of my transcripts to the list of things I need as well. It's going to be a busy week, but I feel wonderfully rested and rejuvenated!
On Vacation
My doing work this weekend is just not going to happen. I'm going on vacation till SUNDAY. Not going to even try to fool myself into thinking I'm going to work--I'm off....
A Lovely Day
Yesterday was a true BREAK from the grind of being a PhD candidate. Yesterday I felt like a "normal" person doing "regular" things. My schedule did not revolve in any way around getting back to the computer, and I am okay with that. Today I am going to continue to take it easy, but I'm making an effort to get a little work done too. When I get in from Driving Miss Daisy today, I'm going to work on my teaching philosophy statement which has been in need of repair for about a month now. The cover letter that I wrote for Tenure Track Position #1 has some very good lines about my relationship with students so I need to add those into the philosophy statement somewhere. I'm also going to get all of my evaluation materials together today and put them in the teaching portfolio file. Lastly, before the day is out, I want to write at least 3 new pages on the Third Chapter. In particular, I need to fill out the biography section. I also need to change the style from MLA to Chicago (yuck!)--maybe I'll just do that today....
Chapter Two--OUT!!
Finally, it is off of my desk. I enjoyed my Labor Day Sunday and Monday and took my time with proofreading, but I put a couple hours in tonight and sent it off to the advisors. It is G-O-N-E!!! Very glad to have that done.
I'm going on vacation this week!! Well not really but it'll feel like a vacation. I'm focusing some energy on job stuff this week and starting Third Chapter.
But, this will only be a three day work week. I have big plans for the weekend and I am going to enjoy it--the whole weekend this time!!
I'm going on vacation this week!! Well not really but it'll feel like a vacation. I'm focusing some energy on job stuff this week and starting Third Chapter.
But, this will only be a three day work week. I have big plans for the weekend and I am going to enjoy it--the whole weekend this time!!
Exhale
Ahhhhhhhhh. Man, this one feels GOOD. After days, weeks, a whole month of excruciating work with this chapter, I finally have it DONE. As it turns out, there was still more that needed to be added to the never ending Chapter Two for me to feel comfortable with it. But it is now ready to go out. Damage when it was all said and done--45 pages. Gracious.
Tomorrow I'll proof the new pieces I added to it--just a quick reading of typos and I need to double-check my footnotes. And then I will SEND IT OFF to my advisors. Hopefully I can get it out before the food is off the grill (yeah its Labor Day cookout time!) It is going to feel incredible to get this thing off my desk. I already feel like a tremendous weight has been lifted even though I technically have one more step to finish this draft.
Special thanks to Dr. J for encouraging me through this one. I needed it and I got your back as you finish your paper.
Tomorrow I'll proof the new pieces I added to it--just a quick reading of typos and I need to double-check my footnotes. And then I will SEND IT OFF to my advisors. Hopefully I can get it out before the food is off the grill (yeah its Labor Day cookout time!) It is going to feel incredible to get this thing off my desk. I already feel like a tremendous weight has been lifted even though I technically have one more step to finish this draft.
Special thanks to Dr. J for encouraging me through this one. I needed it and I got your back as you finish your paper.
Direct Hurricane Aid Opportunity
From one of my sorority sisters in Alabama--bless you soror!
Dear Sorors--
My church has been chosen by the American Red Cross to act as a shelter for the hurricane victims and I just wanted to make the suggestion that we get all the donated goods to the church so that we can have the reassurance that the victims are getting immediate relief and we know where our donations are going. If you want to make, send, or deliver donations to the church, the address is:
Revelations Church Ministries (Hurricane Katrina Relief)
1925 2nd Ave. South
Irondale, AL 35210
Anyone who wants to help can feel free to donate. I'm trying to track down a phone number for the church as well...
Dear Sorors--
My church has been chosen by the American Red Cross to act as a shelter for the hurricane victims and I just wanted to make the suggestion that we get all the donated goods to the church so that we can have the reassurance that the victims are getting immediate relief and we know where our donations are going. If you want to make, send, or deliver donations to the church, the address is:
Revelations Church Ministries (Hurricane Katrina Relief)
1925 2nd Ave. South
Irondale, AL 35210
Anyone who wants to help can feel free to donate. I'm trying to track down a phone number for the church as well...
Don't Wanna Talk About Katrina
I can't watch the news anymore and I really get upset when folks start talking about all that is and isn't being done. Not because I'm mad at them for talking about it, I'm just mad there has to be a conversation at all. Why is it that we can help brown people all over the world, but not the ones who are involuntary minorites in this country (let me not get on that box). To the point--I've become almost allegeric to "Katrina Aftermath" and I haven't been sure why. I think Stewgad has best expressed many of my feelings so I'm linking to her post...Pretty Hard, Dammit: Yet another Hell, Same Handbasket
I missed the radio address from the mayor in New Orleans the other morning--I heard it was dangerously mad as well. Any good links out there to the transcript??
I applaud all organizations and individuals who are stepping up in the face of this crisis. I'm glad that many have realized that surely there is more we can all do besides "send cash." I spoke to one former colleague on-line and asked how I could help--he said, just talk to me, give me some connection to the world outside of this. So like everyone else, every day I am looking for new ways to help and I am relieved to see so much effort in my area already.
I'm praying--I'm praying hard on this one.
I missed the radio address from the mayor in New Orleans the other morning--I heard it was dangerously mad as well. Any good links out there to the transcript??
I applaud all organizations and individuals who are stepping up in the face of this crisis. I'm glad that many have realized that surely there is more we can all do besides "send cash." I spoke to one former colleague on-line and asked how I could help--he said, just talk to me, give me some connection to the world outside of this. So like everyone else, every day I am looking for new ways to help and I am relieved to see so much effort in my area already.
I'm praying--I'm praying hard on this one.
So This is "That" Chapter
My struggle with this Chapter Two business is fit for a Jack London novel--some of that epic woman vs. woman stuff. These revisions are much more trying than they were for Chapter One. I keep finding holes and ideas I need to fill in and expand. Part of this process is rewarding though, I've had quite a few "oh, I wrote that" and "ah ha" moments. I've been impressed with some of my writing in this chapter, and thoroughly embarrassed as well. But at least so far, the obviously embarrassing parts have been fixed before my advisors could see them. Still much more work to be done tomorrow--mostly cosmetic work. But I'm finding that as I fix things up, the length continues to grow. So I've decided that this is "that" chapter--that chapter I've heard several peers talk about that just keeps going and going until eventually you have to just say ENOUGH!
I used to be impressed by my MA thesis. My first work of any significant length, about 120 pages or so. I'm no longer impressed. Just the Chapter One and Two of this thing is going to be more than HALF of that. I knew this would be a big project but GRACIOUS. My content chapters can't be this big--otherwise this thing will just be ridiculous. I want a manageable book and I don't know too many folks publishin 400+ page books these days. So I'm telling myself that this chapter will be the longest because it is a survey of almost 400 years of history. The content chapters--focused on a particular rhetorical text--should NOT be this long.
Here's to the "that" chapter.
I used to be impressed by my MA thesis. My first work of any significant length, about 120 pages or so. I'm no longer impressed. Just the Chapter One and Two of this thing is going to be more than HALF of that. I knew this would be a big project but GRACIOUS. My content chapters can't be this big--otherwise this thing will just be ridiculous. I want a manageable book and I don't know too many folks publishin 400+ page books these days. So I'm telling myself that this chapter will be the longest because it is a survey of almost 400 years of history. The content chapters--focused on a particular rhetorical text--should NOT be this long.
Here's to the "that" chapter.
No Weekend for Me
I am determined to get some things off of this to do list. Fortunately, since its the weekend, there will be no new job postings, so that will be one less means of procrastinating. I talked to a very helpful member of a department that is searching in the Big Ten today. Her friendliness further motivated me to apply so the count is up again. Even though reading the postings is a huge procrastination tool, I did find some things today.
Count
T-T: 6
Postdocs: 7
I think I've figured out who I want to ask to write for each of these positions so far. Gotta get my requests in ASAP so I can get that off the to-do list as well. In the meantime, back to revising Chapter Two AND starting Third Chapter.
This is where life may become confusing. My dissertation is a monster of a project. Two introductory chapters, five content chapters, and a conclusion. Three of my content chapters are drafted--I just need to do more research and expand on them. So I am going to begin work on those first before I start creating chapters from scratch. That way, by the end of this year, I can have three solid analyses and if I need to jettison something to graduate on time, I'll just chuck the stuff that I haven't even started yet. Make sense? These content chapters (I hope) will be on the smallish side--I'm focusing on particular rhetorical moments rather than entire political careers. So each content chapter is the analysis of just one or two texts by a particular Black women politician. Feel me? The three chapters I have drafted happen to be Chapters Four, Five, and Six. But I'm still waiting to determine the final order these chapters are going to be in. I proposed them in a weird topical order, but put them in chronological order in the introduction (Chapter One). So in that order, this Third Chapter would be Chapter Six.
So for the purposes of blogging and self-organization, I'm logging from now on as 3rd, 4th, etc. That way, when I get to the last chapter, I can call it just that LAST Chapter. I think that will feel much better (especially since the last content chapter will probably be Chapter Three and that would be down right depressing to think that I'm only on the third chapter next semester!) All that being on the floor, I'm going to revise for a few more hours and then switch to the Third Chapter. I need to refamiliarize myself with the material and start working on the revision ideas I received on it from one of my professors. Fun Fun Fun.
Count
T-T: 6
Postdocs: 7
I think I've figured out who I want to ask to write for each of these positions so far. Gotta get my requests in ASAP so I can get that off the to-do list as well. In the meantime, back to revising Chapter Two AND starting Third Chapter.
This is where life may become confusing. My dissertation is a monster of a project. Two introductory chapters, five content chapters, and a conclusion. Three of my content chapters are drafted--I just need to do more research and expand on them. So I am going to begin work on those first before I start creating chapters from scratch. That way, by the end of this year, I can have three solid analyses and if I need to jettison something to graduate on time, I'll just chuck the stuff that I haven't even started yet. Make sense? These content chapters (I hope) will be on the smallish side--I'm focusing on particular rhetorical moments rather than entire political careers. So each content chapter is the analysis of just one or two texts by a particular Black women politician. Feel me? The three chapters I have drafted happen to be Chapters Four, Five, and Six. But I'm still waiting to determine the final order these chapters are going to be in. I proposed them in a weird topical order, but put them in chronological order in the introduction (Chapter One). So in that order, this Third Chapter would be Chapter Six.
So for the purposes of blogging and self-organization, I'm logging from now on as 3rd, 4th, etc. That way, when I get to the last chapter, I can call it just that LAST Chapter. I think that will feel much better (especially since the last content chapter will probably be Chapter Three and that would be down right depressing to think that I'm only on the third chapter next semester!) All that being on the floor, I'm going to revise for a few more hours and then switch to the Third Chapter. I need to refamiliarize myself with the material and start working on the revision ideas I received on it from one of my professors. Fun Fun Fun.
Obsession (not the fragrance)
Try as I might, I continue to obsess over the job market/post doc issue. A lot of jobs postings came out in my minor field today, so I spent more time than needed pouring over them because none of the postings really fit me. But, they did lead me to some institutions that are hiring interdisciplinary faculty members, and there were a couple postings that definitely fit me like a glove. So, my application count is growing slowly. Two applications in my major field, none in my minor, and two in interdisciplinary areas. (And I just found two more PostDocs)
Still Keeping score?
T-T positions: 4
PostDocs: 6
Still Keeping score?
T-T positions: 4
PostDocs: 6
So Close
So close I can taste it. So close, but no cigar. So close I can feel it. So close but yet so far away.
I am finishing up Chapter Two. But going back through it is taking longer than I anticipated. There is a lot of good stuff in my draft, a lot of superfluous stuff, and a lot of typos. So after I finish with this edit (hopefully today), I need to go back through it one more time tomorrow before I send it off. I'm changing my self-ascribed due date to Saturday. It's September and I'm sad that I'm still dealing with this chapter, but on Friday, I going to begin my chronicles of the Third Chapter regardless.
For now, back to revisions....
I am finishing up Chapter Two. But going back through it is taking longer than I anticipated. There is a lot of good stuff in my draft, a lot of superfluous stuff, and a lot of typos. So after I finish with this edit (hopefully today), I need to go back through it one more time tomorrow before I send it off. I'm changing my self-ascribed due date to Saturday. It's September and I'm sad that I'm still dealing with this chapter, but on Friday, I going to begin my chronicles of the Third Chapter regardless.
For now, back to revisions....
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